Be the Change
by bexx9
Summary: Dimitri leaves with Tasha, but returns to the Academy 3 years later. When he returns, Rose is a stronger, better, more beautiful person. And she wants nothing to do with him. With everything he has to lose, why does he keep pursuing the love he lost?
1. Chapter 1

I walked onto the grounds, my hand grasped tightly in Tasha's. I wasn't really sure what to expect; everything seemed completely the same, yet something told me it wasn't.

"Are you nervous to be back?" Tasha half whispered.

"Of course not" I replied "But it does feel strange."

I wasn't completely lying. I knew, deep down, I had no reason to be scared. The building was the same, and although many students had graduated and moved on, I knew the staffing was almost the same. It should feel like home, but I suppose I had moved on from this home.

After leaving 3 years ago to guard Tasha, I had barely done any fighting. As I was Tasha's only permanent Guardian, my time away from her was limited, so although I did some training, I was not the guardian I used to be. Perhaps that was why I felt so nervous going back into the building.

After meeting Alberta at the front desk, I left Tasha to talk to her alone whilst I walked through the buildings many hallways. Walking slowly, I started to feel nauseous. The corridors looked almost exactly the same, but the students walking in them were foreign to me. And judging by the following eyes and worried glances around, I was putting them on high alert too.

"Come on Belikov, what's wrong with you?" I muttered to myself, trying to ignore the stares as I walked briskly forward.

I walked into the dusty gym. Empty, strange for this time of night. Looking around, everything was almost exactly the same. Some of the sparring equipment had been replaced, and the stake dummies looked more advanced. I glanced towards one of the sparring mannequins, and laughed lightly. The mark Rose had made one of the permanent mannequins was still there, a dint in the shiny hardness of the plastic man's chest.

Rose.

I had tried not to think of her, the past 3 years. It made my head hurt, wondering about all the things she and Lissa could be doing now. From what I had heard from Tasha, the Dragomirs had been summoned to court, so she was unlikely to be anywhere near here. She had completed her training with another guardian, and apparently passed all of her guardian exams as the best in her class. I wasn't surprised.

I walked back the way I came, towards where Alberta and Tasha were still talking. When Alberta heard me coming, she turned and smiled brightly. I had missed her, truly, but I guessed that the following conversation would be pretty awkward...

"So Belicov, have you heard from Guardian Hathaway recently?" She said brightly. Yup, pretty awkward. It was clearly meant simply as a conversation starter, but the words hurt me slightly. I hadn't.

"Not since I left the Academy." I said shortly, hoping to end the conversation there. Rose's whereabouts would only serve to bring forward more painful memories.

"Well, she returns here tomorrow, to teach the new arrivals some simple skills. Lissa is coming also, Lady Dragomir plans to talk to the Moroi who are yet to specify which type of magic they use on the manifestation of Spirit. Since it's acknowledgement as an element, the Academy have been looking for ways in which to educate young Moroi on it's power. You can probably see Rose then, if you plan on staying that long."

"Why yes, we were planning on staying at least 3 nights before continuing up to Court, so we'll undoubtably see her tomorrow. I was actually hoping to catch up with those two, I presume Christian is with them?" Tasha admitted sheepishly. I frowned. She hadn't mentioned this before, but now that I thought about it, it made perfect sense. Of course she wished to see them, she had no idea of my relationship with Rose.

"Yes, we'll be here" I muttered quietly, and stepped in the direction of the rooms reserved for Moroi visitors and their guardians. Tasha followed my lead, and as we waved goodbye to Alberta, I couldn't help but wonder, why did it have to be the day we visited that Rose appeared again?

"You alright? Aren't you excited to see Rose and Lissa? I know you were fond of them." Tasha's question broke my inner monologue.

"Yes, I'm find. Just tired is all. Driving all the way from yours was a long journey, I think I just need to sleep."

"Of course, lets go."

I couldn't tell her of my apprehensions about seeing Rose, but then again, she probably could sense something else was wrong. I avoided her eyes as we went into our joint rooms. I veered off to the bathroom, shut and locked the door, and stared at myself in the mirror as I let out a deep breath.

"Shit."


	2. Chapter 2

I woke up the next morning feeling as sick as I had the day before. I felt the same feeling of apprehension, but I knew now what it was. I was scared about seeing Rose today.

I shook myself slightly. No, I wasn't going to be scared of seeing her. What do I have to be afraid of? She'll be the same head strong girl I left behind, and I had conditioned myself to stop thinking about her. I had left her once, I could do it again.

I stood from my bed, dressed quickly, and went to the adjoining room to find Tasha. After finding her already fully dressed and made up, we descended to get breakfast in the main hall.

Alberta had sat us in the centre of the table, and as I was not used to eating a whilst Tasha ate, I hesitated slightly. Tasha leaned back and took my hand, pulling me forwards to my seat.

"Here Dimka, you don't need to be my guardian." She whispered.

Tasha was a good friend, but I knew the reasons for her choosing me to be her guardian had never been platonic. She liked me, and although I wished to be her guardian and friend, I wasn't interested in that way. I had spurned her advances in the strongest way possible at first, out of loyalty to Rose, but after the second year, it had become easier to just let her have her way around me.

Alberta leaned over Tasha then, and declared "Guardian Hathaway will be arriving soon with Lady Dragomir."

I tensed. Shit. I wasn't expecting to see them so soon. I held my composure, however, and simply said "Oh, good. They won't miss breakfast then."

Tasha laughed, and Alberta said "Oh, from what I heard from the ladies at court, Guardian Hathaway rarely eats when Lissa does. She truly is a dedicated guardian, standing at her post at all times. In fact, she is seen to be quite the force to be reckoned with. You taught her well, Dimitri."

Tasha smiled at me proudly, but I didn't take this as praise.

"Actually, I think it was I who abandoned her. Whatever skills she has now are from the teaching of my successor."

Tasha's smile faltered, as did Alberta's, and they both turned back to their plates.

From the corner of my eye, I kept watch on the people entering and leaving the hall. However, my guardian skills were obviously rusty, as I didn't notice whoever had slipped in, as the room was blanketed by an eerie silence.

Standing in the centre of the room, was Lady Dragomir and Guardian Hathaway.

Lissa wore appropriate formal wear for a visiting royal, with her hair piled back on her head. She looked confident and, indeed, royal. But that wasn't who I was looking at.

Rose's hair had grown to nearly her waist, and was in long shining curls. Currently, it was all pinned back from her face. Her figure had filled out slightly, and she had built muscle on top of her curves. She wore a tight leather jacket, and leather boots over the top of her combat trousers. She did honestly look more stunning than when I had left, and I hadn't been expecting it. But it was the way she stood that struck me the most. Stood still, she still managed to stand like a force of nature, powerful and strong. She was the same, her arrogant smirk and defiant stance showed that she was still my Rose, the girl I had left behind. No, she was no girl. She was most definitely a woman now.

I sucked in a deep breath, wondering if she knew I was here. Her confidence indicated otherwise, but perhaps she didn't care whether I was here or not. Seeing her looking so calm made me feel odd; had she not missed me at all?

"Oh my, they have both grown fast haven't they?" Tasha whispered quietly.

"Indeed." I bit out, not trusting myself to say anymore. Tasha looking up at me from the corner of her eye, but I chose to ignore it. The room returned to a clamor of noise, with children murmuring and whispering about these strangers.

Tasha stood, and said abruptly "I'm going to the feeders now, coming?" I nodded, and rose to follow her. As Tasha walked down the raised platform, I watched both the girls' eyes pick up on her. Lissa looked at her with warmth, and walked briskly to her to say hello. Rose's eyes, however, simply looked on, calculatingly. She didn't seem annoyed at her presence; Tasha was just another potential risk to Lissa she had to discount. I smiled. She was clearly a good guardian.

Then, her eyes twitched past Tasha, and locked onto mine. She raised a perfect eyebrow at me, and nodded her head. Her hair swooshed slightly, and when it had righted itself, she was again looking at Lissa.

My head swam. I was so close to her, after all these years of being apart, and she didn't even seem to care. I blinked at her, and fought to compose my face. I walked to stand behind Tasha, and focused on the back of her head. Inside, I was conflicted. Do I want to talk to her, or should I simply do what she was doing to me? I felt that if I spoke to her, I would lose whatever inner battle I had been fighting for the past 3 years, I could feel it. I kept my face in its regular mask and prayed she wasn't looking at me.

"Oh it's so lovely to see you too Lissa! How are things at court?" Tasha gushed.

"As good as one can expect, I suppose. Strigoi are still a threat, and with the attacks on royals lately, it's not exactly too peaceful there. Me and Rose thought it would be a nice break to come back to the Academy. Felt like an escape." Lissa turned to look at Rose, laughing lightly. Rose smiled slightly at her and walked forward.

"Although last time, we were escaping from the Academy, not seeking refuge in it." Her eyes blazed brightly as she turned to look at Tasha. "Nice to see you, Lady Ozera."

"Please! Call me Tasha. You're looking well Rose, how are things?"

"Very well, thank you."

"I take it you remember Dimitri here?" Tasha turned to look at me, and in turn took my hands from round my back and grasped one in hers. Rose glanced quickly down at our joined hands, and then back up and straight into my eyes. My heart started beating faster, but my stomach turned when I saw the little emotion there was in her gaze. Her eyes were cold and calculating as always, and although her face showed her confidence in herself, her eyes showed no affection towards me. It felt strange.

"Yes, it's been a while since I saw Dimitri. I see little has changed." She said coolly. I nodded my head and only trusted myself to say "Likewise."

But it became very clear how much had changed. As Rose turned to accompany a retreating Tasha and Lissa, she turned to look at me. For a split second, her eyes betrayed hurt and anger, and I recognised a Rose from the past. Soon however, her mask was back in place. She spun on her heel, every bit the confident woman.

"Coming Comrade?"


	3. Chapter 3

**This is the last chapter I have prewritten. Your thoughts, positive or negative, would be much appreciated! **

**Rebecca x**

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><p>Rose and Lissa had gone to the classrooms, each to teach their own lessons. After saying goodbye, myself and Tasha were left with a free day. We travelled into town, and Tasha dragged me from shop to shop as she tried on clothes and shoes. I was bored, admittedly, but as her Guardian it was my job to follow her. I would never let on that actually, all I could think about was what Rose was doing.<p>

When we returned to the Academy, Alberta was in between places, carrying what appeared to be training stakes in a large, heaving looking bag.

Tasha turned to me. "You run along with Alberta, I'm going to watch Lissa's Spirit class. I'll be fine on my own for a few hours. Meet me at dinner?" I nodded, and she smiled brightly and leaned in to kiss my cheek. I watched her walk up the stairs, and then walked towards a waiting Alberta.

"Need any help?" I asked loudly from the other side of the deserted corridor.

"Oh god, yes, thank you Belikov." Alberta sighed and dropped the bag onto my arm. "How are you today then? You seemed off at breakfast..."

"I'm fine thank you. Just strange to be back is all." I looked at her, hoping to show I was fine by not shying away from her question. It appeared to work, and she smiled and looked away, content with my answer.

When we reached the gym, I dropped the bag in the equipment cupboard.

"Feel free to use any of the equipment, Dimitri. It was, after all, your training area for many years. Might be nice to use it again. The gym should be free now, actually."

I nodded my head; after not training here for so long, it would nice to try things out again. I considered running, but felt like a spar with one of the new mannequins I had seen first.

* * *

><p>After changing into some gym clothing, I walked back towards the gym, and into the equipment cupboard. After picking up my stuff, my ears pricked. I could heard scuffling from inside the gym, but I couldn't make out what it was. Knowing the gym was supposed to be deserted right now, I edged my way closer, holding a stake in my left hand. I threw open then door, but stopped. My heart froze, then sped up double time.<p>

Rose, glistening with sweat and dressed in tight black gym clothes, stood in a ready stance, facing me. She held a stake in her hand too, and was glaring menacingly at the door. She looked terrifying. She relaxed - only slightly, I noticed - when she saw it was me, and a moment of silence passed between us.

"Belikov" she said coolly, before she set down her stake and went to fetch a drink of water.

Turned away from me, I could finally examine her closer than before. She was much more toned, but had not yet become too muscular. Her body was much matured from when I had last saw her, and if anything, was more beautiful. Her hair was scraped back, but it still flowed in waves down her back. It made me happy that she hadn't cut it after becoming a guardian. Here and now, she reminded me of a storm, everything about her exuded power and strength. She was no trainee. She was most definitely Guardian Hathaway now.

She turned around again, and raised an eyebrow at me. A small, cocky smirk played on her lips, as she sank to the floor to put her bottle down.

"Guardian Belikov, please. You can put your stake down. I have no interest in hurting you right now." she said coolly.

I looked at my hand. I was indeed still holding up the stake towards her, as if I was about to attack her. She didn't look at all afraid though. I was no threat to her. The thought shook me slightly.

"Sorry." I all but muttered, and put the stake on the side.

"Can I help you Belikov? If you're looking for Tasha, she's not been through here." Rose looked directly at me, but didn't look phased by my being here. I certainly felt phased...

"No, she's with Lissa. I came down to use the gym, but I see it's occupied. I'll come back tomorrow." I turned to walk hastily out of the gym, but her laughter stopped me.

"Disappointing, Comrade. Disappointing" she laughed. I turned. She stood now, back in her stance, looking every bit the lethal weapon she now was. "Come on. I feel like a bit of a challenge. Spar with me."

I set down my equipment, and stretched off my arms as I walked onto the mats. She was smirking still, but now her eyes were filled with determination. "Are you sure?" I said, not really wanting my first proper encounter with her since I had left to be a fight, especially when I still felt so shaken.

"Of course. After all, if anyone's going to have a shot at beating me, it'll be the man who taught me."

I smiled at that one, falling back into a familiar stance. I nodded at her, and she dropped further into her ready stance. I braced myself for her first move, but none came.

I remembered back to all the other sparring matches we'd had; she always struck first, and I always blocked it. I mentally shook myself. This was clearly not the same Rose as before.

I swung out to the side, and she dropped back half an inch to avoid it. I kicked up, and she glanced it off her arm, like it was nothing. I charged her with another kick, and she simply pushed it off. Then, fast as lightning, she stuck me with a kick to the centre that sent me staggering back. Had I been an opponent of similar weight it would have knocked me flying; it was only my added weight that stopped me from falling. I hit out and glanced her shoulder, and kicked up and narrowly missed her head.

Her eyes were angrier now, and seeing that emotion made me cocky. I swung three punches out and only landed 2, then went to sweep her legs out from under her. She jumped up, and kicked me square in the chest again. I toppled back and looked up.

She was still smirking.

She then flipped over onto her hands, and struck me square in the shoulders with both feet, knocking me backwards and landing on top of me, her stake pressing firmly into my chest. We were both breathing heavily as she lay on top of me, and I could feel every curve pressed into me. I felt my face darken and my breathing go unsteady, but as I watched, her eyes flickered from the anger of before, to something else, to her cold mask once again.

"I think you're losing your touch, Comrade. That was far too easy." She pushed herself off me, avoiding my gaze, and rose gracefully to stand. I sucked in a deep breath of air, and pushed myself up on shaky arms. I fought to make my face go blank, as my eyes dragged over her body. "You're good." I said. "Much improved since I last saw you."

"I am. But I guess it's been a while since you saw me, Belikov." She gathered her things into her bag, and turned back to face me. "I'm going for a run now. It's all yours." She gestured to the gym.

"Thank you." I said, not meeting her eyes. "It's nice to see you Rose. I have heard you are now a great guardian."

"Well, I did learn from the best, didn't I comrade?" She smirked at me once again, and walked away. I was left, stood in awe of the phenomenal woman who had just, after all these years, beaten me.


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4! Reviews would be awesome. Even if it's to tell me how bad it is. I don't mind! **

**Rebecca x**

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><p>I couldn't sleep that night. I just kept replaying the events from that day over and over in my head. At dinner, I had been unable to drag my gaze away from where Rose and Lissa sat, and as stealthy as I tried to be, I could tell Rose could see me staring.<p>

She reminded me of her mother in some ways, a cool professionalism that I remembered from the elder Guardian Hathaway. But where her mother's mask had been cold and expressionless, Rose's was confident. She smiled as if she knew a secret about everyone, like she had us all completely figured out. She probably did. It was disconcerting.

Turning over and over in bed, I kicked frustratedly at the covers. How was I supposed to leave with Tasha in two days time? I couldn't bear it; leaving Rose all over again, after seeing how magnificent she was now, would be torture. I hadn't expected her to grow without me. I had half hoped she had missed me as much as I had missed her, but it seemed that wasn't the case.

I shook my head. I was being an idiot. Rose and I had parted ways a long time ago, and she had clearly moved on. I sighed aloud. What if she had moved on? I had not asked anyone what her current romantic status was. Could she be seeing someone? Hell, she could even be married, I'd been gone long enough.

"Urgh..." I groaned. I was embarrassed with myself at the anger and jealousy that flowed through me at that thought. Who was I, to possess Rose the way I was in my head? It was disrespectful to her. I pushed all thoughts of her from my mind, and began counting backwards from 100 in Russian to make myself fall asleep.

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><p>I woke the next morning to find Tasha already gone. Apparently, her and Alberta had gone to help Lissa with one of her Spirit classes, and would return about lunchtime. I decided to go for a run, as I hadn't run the track around the Academy in a long time. I got changed, as soon I was running through the crisp morning air. I breathed in deeply; I hadn't gotten much sleep last night, and the fresh, cold breeze woke me up well. I looked around. Some dhampirs were running 100m sprints in the middle of the training pitch, but other than that it was deserted.<p>

I looked up. A figure was running quickly, in my direction, from the other side of the field. Rose. At first I felt proud that she still ran the same way I had made her run years ago, but then the implications of her coming towards me set in.

I swore under my breath in russian. I knew I couldn't stop and turn back, she would have already clocked me and seen me coming. Besides, if that was the case, and she was still running, it proved she wasn't scared of me. Turning around would be letting her win.

I carried on running, trying to keep my gaze on the floor. But soon enough, we were directly in front of each other.

"Belikov" She greeted me, nodding her head formally.

"Hathaway" I nodded back. Using her last name felt strange, but I refused to call her Rose, if I was now Belikov.

"I see old habits die hard. Where do you run when you're with Lady Ozera?" She seemed to question with polite interest, but I sensed a subtle bitterness under her question.

"I don't, usually. Tasha has no other guardian, I spend most of my time with her."

"How dull. But I suppose it is your duty. At court, we simply have someone else watch over Lissa whilst I train. Though, I suppose my bond leaves me connect at all times. You have no connection with Tasha."

We both sensed the double meaning in her words, but I refused to let it show. I looked right at her, and found her staring straight into my eyes. We stood like that for a moment.

"You seem different now, Dimitri." She looked me over, as if she was trying to figure out a complicated puzzle, and couldn't. She stepped forward, and looked back up at my face.

"I'm definitely not the only one who has changed, Roza." I was almost whispering, and I stepped closer still. We were now only inches apart, but my brain wasn't registering it. It wasn't registering anything. Rose was all I could see.

She stared into my eyes again, and I couldn't stop myself from asking. "Are you with someone now?"

She frowned slightly at the question. "No. My duty is to Lissa. I don't need anyone else." She had edged slightly closer now, and I could feel her breath on my cheek.

I nodded, almost brushing her nose with mine. The close proximity to her was making my breathing heavier and my palms clammy. I felt like there was a firework in the pit of my stomach, and I felt hot all over. Suddenly, she started to back off, as if she sensed what I was feeling. Or maybe she felt it too, I wouldn't know. She started a light jog again, and called back to me without looking, "See you around Belikov."

I sighed, and leaned against the stone wall. Running my hands through my hair, I thought about what had just passed. The tension had been almost unbearable, but seeing her leave had left me feeling empty and tense. I slammed my fist hard into the wall; I was angry at everything. Angry at Tasha from taking me from Rose. Angry at Rose for acting as if she didn't even care. And angry at myself. I had left her, when we both knew how we felt. I deserved the pain of being without her, but it didn't mean I liked it. I slammed my fist into the wall again, and slid down to the floor. I sat, looking out at the dhampirs training for a while, until I heard someone come up to my right.

It was Rose. She was pink in the face and out of breath, and she stared at me like she was both angry at me, and sad. A moment passed, and I stayed sat, staring up at her.

"Why did you leave, Dimitri?" She finally accused. I stayed silent, but my heart froze. I had no answer.

"You just left. You didn't even say goodbye. I had to find out from my mother! And you never came to find me. You never explained. What, did you just forget about me?" Her face was a rosy colour and her eyes sparkled. Her anger radiated off her like heat.

She stepped closer to me. "Answer me!" she demanded. "You don't get to pretend I'm not here, not again."

I moved to grab her shoulders. "I never forgot you Roza. Never. You don't think it was killing me too? I thought about you every day when I was gone! You never called!"

Rose pushed me off her. "Oh no. You don't get to play the victim. You left me!"

She turned away from me. I stared at the back of her head, willing her to speak to me. But I had nothing to say. Once again, she had left me speechless.

"I dealt with it. I grew up, I'm a better guardian for it. Hell, I'm the best there is, and Lissa will always be safe because of me. I didn't need you."

Spinning round, her eyes were wild now. "But why did you have to come back?"

I couldn't look at her now. My heart was pounding much too fast and the back of my neck was sweating. I felt angry now too, mostly at myself for letting her get so hurt, and then letting her build up this wall. I felt so guilty, and so angry.

"I'm sorry! Roza, I'm so, so sorry. I shouldn't have left, and I know that. But what do you want me to say?" I grabbed her shoulders again, and spun her around so her back was against the wall. "Say anything, Roza, and I'll do it. There's got to be something I can do, something I can say!"

She stared back into my eyes, and I saw the emotion drain out of her eyes. Her walls were back up.

"But that's just it comrade. There's no need. I was fine before you turned up, and I'll be fine once you left." She forced my arms down from her sides, and walked away. Gradually, she sped up to a run, and she faded into the distance.

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><p>After meeting up with Tasha, the day passed without anything eventful. At dinner, Tasha and Lissa told me about the Spirit lessons, and I listened with feigned interest. Rose never looked at me.<p>

After we had finished eating, I left Tasha and went for a walk. I relished in the time I was allowed to spend away from her. It wasn't that I didn't like Tasha, or enjoy her company. I just was always with her, and it was nice now to have other guardians to take my place.

The air outside was cold, and a light breeze ruffled my hair. I pulled my coat around me closer, and set off walking.

"Guardian Belikov, wait!" It was Lissa, wrapped in a royal blue coat and scarf.

"Lady Dragomir, what're you doing here? Where is Rose?"

"She's in the gym. I'm making a concerted effort not to feel any strong emotions, and hoping she won't figure out I'm here. I need to talk to you."

I turned away slightly. "Shall we go on a walk then?"

Lissa nodded, and fell into step beside me. "Rose has not mentioned you since your departure. She doesn't like to talk about it. But I know you hurt her, Dimitri. And I know you know that too."

I glanced at Lissa, but kept my head down. I had no excuses.

"Rose doesn't want to admit it, but being here with you is hurting her." Lissa paused, and looked off into the distance. "She sold her soul to the Academy the day you left, Dimitri. Played by the rules, and it paid off, I suppose. She's the best Guardian there is, and she gets hundreds of offers from Royals at Court to guard them. And she's still Rose. She has half the men at court panting after her, and the other half cowering in fear." We both laughed lightly.

We stopped at the doorway that led into where Lissa and Rose were staying. Lissa continued. "She loved you, Dimitri. I think she still does. But you can't leave her with no explanation, not again. I know you love her too."

She pushed open the door, but paused. "Or, if you don't have anything to say, avoid her. She's been through enough pain in her life, she doesn't need any more." And with that, Lissa pushed open the door, and left me standing in the cold.

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><p>After the confrontation with Lissa, I had sworn to avoid Rose. It was best for her and best for me.<p>

This was, however, easier said than done.

I avoided her at breakfast, feigning stomach upset and going for a run instead. A long run.

I left Tasha to watch Rose's class alone, and helped Alberta sort through the washing in the locker room.

I skipped lunch, and helped out in an extracurricular class for novices behind in their studies.

But in the afternoon, she caught up with me again. I was sparring in the gym, taking all my frustration out on a poor helpless dummy, when she sauntered into the room.

"That must be one pretty mean Strigoi, the way you're punching that thing."

I stopped, and dropped my guard. "There aren't that many amicable Strigoi, Guardian Hathaway. Or are you still innocent, in the ways of the Strigoi?"

She laughed, but it was without humour. "Oh, but Dimitri. We both know I'm far from innocent."

In a flourish, she flipped her hair over her shoulders, and showed me the back of her neck. Along with her promise mark, there were 23 Molnija marks.

I sucked in a deep breath in order to keep from swearing. It was... impressive. It was scary. It was hot.

She flipped her hair back over her shoulders and looked at me. The movement had brought us much closer together.

"Beat ya." She whispered. "See, when you left, I got good. Really good."

"You were always good Rose. You were phenomenal."

"Ah, but I was distracted. Now I know my purpose. I'm forgetting about you Dimitri. Tomorrow when me and Lissa leave, I'll never have to see you again."

It sounded like a challenge more than a statement. Her eyes were filled with determination, the same look I imagined her getting when faced with Strigoi.

"I wish for only the same" I said, leaning in closer. Liar.

"I won't even think about you." She breathed fiercely.

"Nor I about you."

"You were a poor teacher."

"You were an unruly novice."

"I hate you."

"No you don't"

And then I kissed her. It was hot and hard, a battle for dominance between us both. She clung to my shoulders, and I grasped her waist tight. I felt her pushing me, and soon I was pressed tight to the wall, feeling her hands pull at my hair and shirt. I couldn't tell if she was trying to pull me closer or push me away, but I didn't care. All I could feel was her.

She pulled away to draw breath, and I spun her around so she was pressed to the wall now, my torso pressed into her. We kissed hard, dragging out each movement of our lips as if we couldn't bear to be apart.

Then she kicked her legs out, and I staggered backwards.

_"You bastard."_


	5. Chapter 5

**Thankyou so much for the reviews. If anyone has any negative feedback on this chapter, or ideas for a future one, i'd love to hear them. thanks!**

**Rebecca x**

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><p><em>"You bastard"<em>

I blinked once. Twice. Three times. Nope. It still didn't make any sense.

"I'm sorry, what? A minute ago you were kissing me back!" I was stammering, and blushed at the obvious effect she had on me.

"I am not the same little kid you dumped here 3 years ago, Comrade. You can't just waltz back in and act like you never left!"

"I had a duty to do, a duty to protect Tasha! I took the job so I could be with you some day, but I didn't think it through.. If I could take all back..."

"But you can't, can you?" The fire was gone from her eyes, and I knew I had lost her again. "Go back to your precious Tasha. She's all you have now. You certainly don't have me."

Rose then stood upright, and shoved me out of the way on her way out of the room. In a second, she was gone.

I stood there in stunned silence for a few minutes. Then I righted myself, went up to my room, slammed the door, and collapsed on the bed. My brain ran in circles, two thoughts turning in parallel. The first was an all consuming anger at this game Rose was playing with my head. But the more I contemplated it the more I realised I knew I deserved it.

The second was a way to make it right, or rather, a lack thereof. There was no plan I could come up with that wasn't tainted by my anger, and even fewer plans that actually stood any chance of working.

My thoughts were interrupted, however, by the re arrival of Tasha. I blinked and sat up. I had been asleep for a few hours, it was now 6pm.

"Hey Dimka, you ok? You look awful.." She said with concern.

"I'm fine, thank you. Just tired."

"Well, if you like, I can find another guardian for tonight, and you can stay here and here and get some rest?"

I frowned. "What's tonight?"

She laughed. "Oh Dimka, you really are out of it aren't you? It's the Royal Jubilee. We're all getting the cars to Court in 20 minutes. Which reminds me, you're not even dressed. You had clearly forgotten."

I stood upright quickly. "Shit, yes. You're right, I had forgotten. I will be dressed and ready to accompany you as quick as possible. Sorry, Tasha."

She walked out the room, and I began to hurriedly get ready. Momentarily, my thoughts flicked back to Rose. Of course, she would be there. This would be interesting.

* * *

><p>Upon arrival to Court, we were ushered into a magnificent ballroom. Under the dim lights of the chandeliers, the dhampirs' darker skin glowed and the Moroi's skin shone. Queen Tatiana stood regally among her guests, but quickly came to greet Tasha as she entered the room.<p>

The first thing I noticed was the security. After the attacks on Court that had happened recently, Tasha had said they were taking safety of the Royals very seriously. The difference between Guardians that were assigned and Guardians that weren't was apparent in their clothing. Tatiana had also insisted, as was her way, that the Guardians assigned to Royals dressed in black tie. Thus there was me, me stood uncomfortably in a suit I had no business wearing. I took comfort, though, in the similar looks of discomfort from other male guardians around the room.

I followed Tasha as she mingled around the room. Whatever Tatiana's ideas were about making Guardians stand out less were naive; it was clear who was Moroi and who was Dhampire just by who was following who.

I noticed Lissa, stood over with some other Royals by the bar. Lissa looked every bit the royal, and in her long white dress, she reminded me of an angel. Immediately, I started scanning for Rose, but couldn't find her. I did however, see Tasha walk over to Lissa, so followed her. Rose would be in eye sight of Lissa at all times, I was bound to see her from there.

Sure enough, once I walked over to the bar, I saw her, leaning on a podium and keeping permanent watch on Lissa. I once again noted her exceptional ability as a guardian; she had definitely picked the best spot in the room. But that wasn't the first thing I noticed.

She wore a long, strapless black dress, with a slit up the side that nearly reached the top of her leg. Her hair was down, in messy waves that curled all the way down her back. She looked stunning, in all senses of the word. She also looked dangerous; in all black, she looked the exact opposite of Lissa. I saw her eyes flick to me, travel down my body and then away. I walked over to her, and leant on the other side of the podium. She now couldn't leave without making it obvious she was avoiding me, but it also meant we couldn't look at each other, meaning I would probably be able to form words correctly.

"Hathaway." I said, making an attempted at speaking coldly. I didn't want to give away that all the feelings from earlier had come surging back.

"Belikov. How are you?"

"I've been better"

"Oh?"

"Yes."

"I see"

We fell into silence, a silence neither of us wanted to be the first to break. Standing there, either side of the podium, it felt like there was a world between us. I watched Tasha mingle with guests, and lost myself in the blur of people. But I was broken out of my thoughts when Tatiana and Lissa walked over to us both.

"Belikov, Hathaway. You look bored, and it offends me. This is a party! Dance!" A tipsy Tatiana slurred.

"No" we said in union, "I don't think so."

"Go on! I order it!" Tatiana commanded, clapping her hands and giggling in a very un-royal way.

I turned to Rose. She looked as unhappy as I felt, but we both knew we would arouse suspicion if we put up more of a fight. She offered her hand unwillingly, and we walked to the centre of the room.

The song that started playing as I took her into my arms was Turning Tables, by Adele. I didn't know the song, but the look of recognition on Rose's face showed that it was not the kind of song she had been hoping for.

I placed one hand on her hip, and I felt tingling on my hand. Crap. This was going to be harder than I thought.

We swayed to the music, avoiding each other's eyes. At first it was awkward, but as the song built up towards it's chorus, I forgot the people milling around us. I could only see her.

I brought her closer to me, held her hand tighter. I flung her out and she gracefully span back into my arms, pressing closer, if that was at all swayed and spun, and I never broke eye contact with her. As the climax of the song came closer, we spun faster, tighter, closer. I couldn't let her go.

But soon the song came to a close, and we stood, dead centre of the ballroom, still as statues, looking at each other. Rose frowned at me slightly, and her eyes were sad. Here and now, it was only me and Rose, stood in plain sight, but feeling as though we were the only people in the world.

And then our world was shattered.

Momentarily we were plunged into pitch darkness. Soon, a fire Moroi lit the candles attached to the walls, and now we could make out shapes. There were screams of panic, Moroi shouting for their guardians.

The windows on the West wall shattered like gunshots, and dark shadows crawled through, darkness covering them. I felt Tasha come up close to me, and grab my hand. I pushed her behind me. Out the corner of my eye, I saw Lissa come up to Rose too, and the panic on both of their faces was tangible. Guardians were running to each door and window, and Tatiana's guards circled her protectively.

I looked at Rose, and emotions passed between us, followed by an understanding. We dropped in our fighting stances, stakes in hand, back to back.

_It was a Strigoi attack._


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter 6! I'm not terribly confident with this one, and it's also pretty long. I have prewritten most of chapter 7, the ideas and structure are all there, but I would love some feedback on this before I post it. Again, all kinds of criticism welcome!**

**Rebecca x**

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><p>The first thing I noticed was that they weren't going specifically for Moroi. They were literally biting everyone in sight - which in my experience was strange, considering the benefits of Moroi blood to Strigoi.<p>

Whilst I staked a Strigoi that had been aiming for Rose, a chilling thought hit me; they were taking out the dhampires first, because they didn't expect the Moroi to go anywhere. They knew we weren't going to escape.

I surveyed the area. They had a point. The guards that had gone to cover the doors were dead, and Strigoi were pouring through them now too.

On first guess, I would think there were around 150 Strigoi, meaning we still had them outnumbered, with around 100 Moroi, each with a dhampire guardian, plus a further 150 guards. But we were still dropping like flies.

It had clearly been planned out; to get this many Strigoi in one place, with a common purpose. It was a smart plan, I thought, as I staked another Strigoi. All the royal Moroi were in one place. Should their plan work, all 12 families would be destroyed, and there would be no monarchy for the Moroi.

Tasha stood behind me, shooting flames at the Strigoi who were coming through the doors. The surrounding Moroi looked at her in shock; using magic defensively was rare, and considered un-royal. Soon however, I saw earth users were attempting to block the windows, although it didn't seem to be working. Moroi weren't taught to use their magic defensively.

But I had bigger problems, mainly the Strigoi that were staring to circle Vasilisa and Tasha. Whilst fighting them, I couldn't tell if they knew they were royals and were specifically after their blood, or if the Strigoi simply wanted to take on Rose, by far the most attractive and skilled Guardian fighting. Either way, they were having a hard time getting close to either of them.

Strigoi are strong, and much faster than Dhampires. But Rose was still fast, and she was also brave. The strigoi were weren't expecting it; Rose was attacking them with so much skill and power that they were momentarily stunned, and easier to disarm and stake. Rose has so far taken down 4, and myself 2.

Looking up, Vasilisa appeared to be creating illusions around the Strigoi closest to Rose, because soon, they all turned and started fighting and biting each other. Rose backed off, shot a quick smile at Lissa, then turned to me.

"They're everywhere, and guardians are already in short numbers. We need to seal them in here, and get all the Moroi out. Then figure out what to do." Rose was talking quickly, and her eyes were darting around the room. She looked so focused, it was enchanting. But I knew Lissa couldn't hold her illusions for too long, and other Strigoi were starting to pick up on them.

I grabbed Rose, Tasha and Lissa and pulled them through the crowd and towards Tatiana's guards, stopping to stake potential threats on the way.

On the way, we saw a crowd of Moroi, surrounded by 4 or 5 Strigoi. Immediately, Rose pulled out my grasp and began to fight and stake them. She was tough, taking them all on, but they soon knocked her flying. Before they could crowd over her, I stepped in, but it was only Tasha's fire that made them finally retreat into the crowd. Rose stood, then pulled the Moroi into our group. There were now 9 of us, and we were becoming a bigger target.

By the time we reached the back of the hall, where Tatiana was, both me and Rose were out of breath, and Lissa and Tasha's strength, and thus magic, was dwindling.

"What's the plan?" Rose said quietly, but directing it at all of Tatiana's guards. He seemed shocked that we had got to the back, and also that Strigoi hadn't targeted us. Rose nodded in the direction of Lissa, and his eyes flickered with understanding. He then pulled Tasha and Lissa into the guardian's protective circle, along with Tatiana.

"We have to get all the Moroi out of the ballroom and into the cars. After that, we'll probably just have to fight the Strigoi until one side wins, or burn the place down. I see nothing else for it." A guard close to us said.

"The Strigoi will see us trying to leave, and something tells me they won't take it lightly. There's no way we can sneak out of here without them noticing either." I pointed out.

Rose frowned, and turned to face the ballroom, and then a very pale Lissa. Her illusions wouldn't hold for much longer; making this many people disappear was hard work. Rose looked worried; I was too. I couldn't think of anything that would distract the Strigoi long enough to get all the Moroi out, and it's not like Lissa could make them all disappear.

But more spirit users could.

Rose and I both turned to look at each other.

"Is Adrian Ivashkov here?" Rose said quickly.

"Yes, but I haven't seen him or his guardian yet.." The guard looked around worriedly, but soon his gaze cleared and he spoke loudly over the deafening noise of screams and crashes.

"There, over by the East window, Adrian and his guardian. Adrian keeps disappeared and reappearing though..."

Clearly, Adrian was using Spirit to confuse the Strigoi, but his cockiness meant he couldn't just sit put under cover. Apparently, the idiot wanted to provoke the Strigoi; as if he wasn't a big enough target already, being the grand-nephew of the Queen.

Rose spun around, located them both, and then darted out of Lissa's cover. She ran fast, and dodged the onslaught of Strigoi that darted out to meet her. It was impossible, truly, until I saw that in our crowd, there was an Air Moroi, pushing Rose forward faster with his magic. The other Moroi watched him with both distaste and wonder, and I nodded at him to show my gratitude. She reached Adrian, and they both disappeared.

I felt stupid, cowering behind the illusions Lissa was creating. I knew I couldn't leave my charge, but as I saw fellow Guardians fall, I felt guilty. I should be fighting, not hiding.

Because out there was a battlefield. None of the other guardians had charges who were willing to fight, and none were as lucky as to have a Spirit wielder with them either. So they were coverless and alone, fighting to protect their 1 charge from so many Strigoi at once. I watched as people I had trained with fell, and felt anger bubble up in my chest.

Before I could do anything stupid, Rose appeared with Adrian. Once my eyes had flickered to hers, I calmed down. Although my head told me I was here with Tasha, my heart felt like it was Rose I was fighting for.

"We need both Lissa and Adrian to locate the Moroi charges in the crowd and cover them with illusions. Then one of us need to collect them all at one side of the hall, break through the Strigoi and get them to the cars. But for this to work, we need a distraction."

The guards looked baffled; most were probably too slow to understand the quick onslaught of words, the rest just simply had no bright ideas for how to distract close to a hundred Strigoi.

Tasha stepped forward.

"Me. I can set fire to the tapestries on the walls, or burn the Strigoi that aren't near Moroi. My fire is the only sure thing we've found to scare them."

I saw the Moroi in our group's mouths drop. There was silence. It was by far the best idea we could come up with, but endangering a Moroi life was something none of us wanted to do. _They come first._

I turned to face her. She had acceptance written all over her face.

"If you do this Tasha, I will stay with you, 100%. We'll get you out of this."

She nodded. "I have faith in you Dimitri."

I turned to Rose and Lissa. Rose nodded, but she didn't seem happy about it. Lissa's pale face conveyed that she too understood what had to be done.

The guards began to form a tight circle around everyone except myself, Rose and Tasha. Under Adrian and Lissa's cover, they edged out of the back door, and then reappeared without the Moroi. It seemed to have worked first time, under the illusion of Spirit, but now blocking the door was taking all the guards' attention, as more Strigoi were starting to look up from their fights, or food, and notice that somehow, Moroi were escaping.

Knowing the queen was safe calmed me slightly. Getting the rest of the Moroi out would be much more difficult.

I nodded to Tasha.

"Now."

She turned away, and with a grimace, all the tapestries were alight.

The screams were deafening.

I watched as Strigoi climbed out of the windows and hid under tables, and most backed away into the centre of the room. To this day, I don't think anyone understands why they are so afraid of Moroi fire.

Strigoi spun around, looking for a source, their pale skin glowing in the fire's light. But not only could they not see who had done it. They now couldn't see ANY Moroi. It was clear we had aggravated them, a dangerous this.

Turning back, we saw Adrian nodding at us, to let us know the Moroi were all covered. I slipped out of the illusion, and gestured wildly towards the door. I couldn't tell if everyone could see me, or if they were following instructions, but seeing me angered the Strigoi caught in a crowd by the fire. They tried to break out, but the fire kept them enclosed. I knew that if Tasha's fire were to falter, they would escape almost immediately.

Adrian reappeared by the door, to let us know that all the moroi were in the reception room, and safe. A few dhampires still fought with Strigoi on the sides of the room, and in the centre was a massive group of them.

"Could you burn the group in the centre, Tasha?" Rose asked.

"I could try, but once I do that I'll burn out, I'm sure. I would be able to use magic for a while, and I'll be useless."

"No, Tasha. That's all we need you to do. Once that is done, you need to leave, and get in a car and go home. Ask for one of the guards to take you." Rose spoke quietly but passionately. She clearly respected Tasha for what she was doing. That didn't stop her from scowling slightly when she took my hand.

"Dimitri, what if they notice it's me burning them? See through the illusion or something."

"Nothing will happen to you Tasha. I promise you that."

She nodded, and blinked back tears. I felt for her then, in that moment. I had been trained to fight, she had had it thrust upon her, after years of safety. I felt like a failure as a guardian.

But still, she stood forward, and frowned, furrowing her eyebrows and lifting her palms towards the ceiling. A second passed, and then the Strigoi erupted into bright flames, almost blue in their power. I saw Tasha struggle to hold it, but once all the bodies had fallen to the floor, she relaxed. She swayed, her eyes flickering shut, and I reached to grab her. Adrian released his illusion, and a guard ran in to carry Tasha out.

The strigoi left - there must have been only 6 or 7 - were distracted by their friends burning in the centre of the room. The remaining guards staked them down; I was pleased to see there were actually a fair few left. Once the last was dead I let out a sigh. It was over.

* * *

><p>Later, I looked at the floor of the once elegant ballroom. What you could see of the mosaic on the floor was now smeared with blood, and the rest was covered with the bodies of the fallen. Some were Strigoi, some were Dhampire, some were Moroi. All were dead.<p>

I suddenly had an overwhelming appreciation for the fact that I was alive. Then I was angry with myself for letting little things bother me, for being scared when there was nothing to fear. And Rose. I was angry for letting her do this to us.

"Rose." I said, meaning to tell her everything I felt right there, right now.

But when she turned to face me, her face pale in the face of what had happened, I faltered. Seeing her, fresh with the glow of her efforts during the fight, made me forget what I had to say before.

"Thank god you're still here" I close to whispered, as I picked her up and spun her around in my arms. She laughed as she span, her hair whipping out from its tie and flying down and around her face.

I put her down, and just stood, her arms around my neck and mine around her waist. We stood, in the same ballroom we had but 2 hours previous, feeling the same emotions we had then.

Except this time, I was fearless.

I bent to kiss her, putting everything I felt into the movement of my lips over hers. The relief of still being here coupled with the desperation I felt for her made the kiss seem violent, like the dully burning fire in the centre of the room.

When the kiss came to it's natural close, I realised how tightly she was wound around me, her breasts pressed into my chest, her leg wrapped over my hip. We both laughed lightly as we untangled, and I held her hand as we stood there.

Then the light faded from her eyes as she took in her surroundings again. It felt as if the kiss had been to prove that we were still here, still alive, but it didn't change the death that surrounded us. Her smile wavered and died, and I saw her shut her eyes to check on Lissa. Satisfied she was ok, she came back, and turned to face me over her shoulder.

"No matter how much you might like to pretend that the world is happy and bright when you're hidden away with Tasha, it's not. There are dark things in our world, things bigger than us.  
>This was a lucky fight. It's clear that whoever organised the ambush didn't have long to train the Strigoi. They were still weak, only just coming into their skills. Had they been fully formed, understood their potential, they would have slaughtered us."<p>

She paused and looked around. "Slaughtered more of us, I mean."

I looked around the room. As the light of the dying fires reflected off the blood, I realised that there was nothing I could do that would strip this memory away. I now knew I was needed at Court; I couldn't leave this world, Rose's world, in the state it was now. A monarchy under threat, a frightened people.

Rose continued, still not facing me. "You should never have come, Dimitri. This stunt we pulled today will not go unnoticed. Strigoi now know of Tasha, and of Lissa. They know they're willing to use their magic against them, which makes them a threat to the Strigoi. Which makes them targets. You need to leave."

"I'm not leaving you." I said loudly, firmly. "Never again, Roza. We belong together."

"Dimitri, can't you see?" She said bitterly. "This is bigger than us. This is bigger than Tatiana herself! This was organised! Orchestrated by someone with more knowledge, and more power than us. There are spies among the Moroi, traitors in the Guardians! We are not safe! And the sooner you and your precious Tasha leave, the better it'll be."

"Oh. So this isn't about the war with the Strigoi. This is about you, and how you're scared of this. Of us."

Rose scoffed, her laugh so far tainted by her anger and fear that it was a sound without any light.

"I'm not scared of you Dimitri."

"No? Then why are you pushing me away?"

"Because you have Tasha! And I have Lissa. I don't need you anymore!"

She said Tasha like it was a dirty word, and I fought the urge to smirk.

"Yes, you do, Roza. We need each other, you know that."

She spun round to face me again, fire burning in her eyes, her face flushed.

"Don't you dare. Don't you fucking dare imply that you are _anything_ to me Dimitri. You left. You forfeited your hold over me a long time ago, and if you had loved me you would never have done so. I don't trust you, and I don't need you."

"You certainly trusted me in the battle today. How many other people would you have let guard your back today, or trusted to follow into a fight?"

"Your arrogance deludes you Dimitri, I needed no cover. I'm capable of defending myself; don't kid yourself into thinking I'm anything like the novice you trained."

"_My_ arrogance? You stand there and all but call me a liar for telling you how I feel!"

Rose turned away, and her turned back angered me.

"You say you don't need anyone to fight for you, but I will. I'll fight until the day I die Roza, because I might be nothing to you, but you're everything to me."

She started to walk away, and tossed her final words over her shoulder, almost casually.

"Don't bother comrade. I'm not fighting back."

* * *

><p>Needless to say, I was emotional after that. I walked into the hall and watched the last remaining Moroi piled into cars to be taken to feeders or healing centres. As I watched cars drive away, I became more and more angry with Rose.<p>

She was right. If she didn't want me to fight for her, why should I? She toyed with my feelings and all but broke my heart, why should I fight for this woman? The more I thought, the more enraged I became. She was heartless, incapable of love. In my heart, at that moment, I gave up on making Rose love me, or even like me. I just wanted to extract some kind of emotion out of her. I no longer cared what.

I took a car back to the Academy, and ascended the steps two at a time. I wanted to spite Rose. I wanted her to hurt like I was.

I knocked on the heavy wooden door of our room, and then pushed it open. Walking through my room, I knew what I was going to do was wrong, but I also knew it would hurt.

"Tasha? We need to talk."


	7. Chapter 7

**Sorry for the delay! I'm still not terribly sure about this chapter, but I've reworded it enough that I really, really don't want to keep going with it! So leave me a review?**

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><p>I felt sorry for the mannequins in the Academy's gym. Since I had arrived, I'd really been taking a lot of frustration out on them. They were quite resilient, really, and they always bounced back, ready for more.<p>

They always came back.

Creaking as they swung back on their hinges, I pounded into them again and again, until my knuckles were red raw and I was sweating profusely. I felt a little better. Less angry. Less sick. Less like a failure.

But not much.

* * *

><p>Walking into Tasha's room, I was set on what I was going to do. Hell, if Tasha was what I had, why shouldn't I take advantage of it? So what, if I didn't feel the same way? It would make Tasha happy. It might even make me happy. And more than that, it would hurt Rose.<p>

I pushed open her door without knocking. The lights were dim in her room, and she was curled in the centre of her bed.

I sat down on Tasha's bed, and she smiled up at me from her sitting position. When I said nothing, she spoke quietly. "Is everything alright Dimka?"

My eyes flitted up to hers when she spoke. "Yes, Tasha. Everything's fine. I just wanted to discuss something with you."

Staring at Tasha's worried expression, it dawned on me how much I really didn't want this. I didn't want her. I was only doing it to spite Rose, and it wasn't me.

I was looking for a way out, a way to stop feeling the way I felt. But burying myself in Tasha - in more ways than one - wouldn't make it go away. Even now, after everything, it was still there. The banging of my heart in my chest was almost too loud, pounding out _this is wrong. _

Tasha _was_ brave. She was also beautiful, and smart. But she wasn't mine. I felt her reach out for me, and her touch did nothing. If anything, it just made me feel more alone. Staring at her, I felt nothing. I only felt empty as I realised what I had planned to do, and what that made me.

I stood from her bed, and went and sat in the padded blue chair across. I couldn't look at her anymore, and instead focused on the unremarkable watercolour painting hanging over her bed. I could sense Tasha becoming uncomfortable at my obvious agitation, but I had no words to sooth her. I could make no sense of it myself. Suddenly, everything I was doing felt wrong. I thought back to the scene in the ballroom at Court. The fight.

Staring at the carpeted floor, I felt more like a coward than ever. Running away from my fight with Rose, running to Tasha. Running from the problems at court and hiding away. This wasn't how I was raised.

"I want to stay here." I said abruptly. Tasha looked startled, and then relieved.

"Oh Dimka, is that all? We can stay as long as you like, I had hoped to catch up with Christian when he turns up anyway."

I shook my head quickly, pushing my hands through my hair. "No, Tasha. I want to stay here permanently. I.. I can't be your guardian anymore."

Tasha's face went blank, and almost immediately morphed into one of distress and upset. She stood off her bed, and started towards me.

"Why? Is it something I did? I promise, I didn't.."

I cut her off quickly by raising my palm; it was far too painful to know she would blame herself for this. She stood still, as if my words were a brick wall she'd just run in to.

"No, Tasha. It isn't you at all. It's me."

I stood off the chair, but still couldn't meet Tasha's hurt eyes. "You saw the brutality today. I can't walk away from that. I can't leave the Royal Court in the mess it's in now, knowing there are things I can do to help. You have to understand, this is just where I'm meant to be now."

Tasha's face fell blank, and there was a long moment of silence, wrought with tension.

"It's Rose, isn't it?"

My head snapped up. "What?"

"You don't want to stay with me, now that you have Rose back." She hissed now, her eyes blazing and her hands clenched into small fists by her side. The once calm exterior was now anything but; she was filled with her fire now. "You want to run away to be with your oh-so-talented dhampire, and you don't want me anymore. I was just a distraction, wasn't I? To take your mind off her."

Tasha's eyes flicked to the door. She raised her hand, and the chair I had been sat on went up in flames. I backed away, and set about finding something to put it out with. Once it was out, Tasha was gone.

But I could hear her a mile off.

* * *

><p>"Get out here you little slut! I said get out!" She was hammering into Rose and Lissa's door, with more anger than I had ever seen in her. The door vibrated loudly on its hinges, and I wouldn't be surprised if the entire floor was awoken by the noise.<p>

The heavy wooden door swung open, and Lissa stood there, bleary eyed and confused. She looked completely drained, the bags under her eyes a stark contrast to the paleness of her skin. She didn't have time to say anything though, before Rose pulled her into the room and stood at the doorway, hands on hips, glaring at Tasha. She wore an oversized jersey and shorts, and her hair was piled up on her head in a messy bun.

"Lady Ozera, this is highly unorthodox." Her words were icy, and it was all I could do not to laugh at how incredibly pissed off she looked.

"Don't you bullshit me. What's unorthodox is you _stealing_ my Guardian!" Tasha was clearly furious, but more than that, she seemed also irrational. As if she wasn't herself. I pulled back on her shoulder gently, but she shrugged me off. I wanted to avoid having to drag her into her room by force, especially since she was clearly willing to use her magic on me.

"I don't understand what you're talking about Lady Ozera. I have no interest in stealing Dimitri from you..."

"Lying to my face, just as he did! Filthy bloodwhore, stay away from him!" Tasha flung her skinny arm out towards Rose, who caught it effortlessly in her hand. Tasha winced in pain as Rose bent her wrist back.

"Lady Ozera, listen to me." Rose hissed menacingly. "Dimitri is yours. I have no interest in the two of you, or your lives. But if you plan on continuing to disturb Lady Dragomir whilst she tries to sleep, I'll have you escorted from the Academy, permanently. Are we understood?"

Her voice dripped with malice, and with every word she inched closer to Tasha, until she was stood nose to nose with her. I caught Lissa frowning, her tired eyes filling with sympathy for Tasha. That was so typical.

Tasha ripped her arm out of Rose's grip, and stumbled backwards at the effort. Her eyes flicked manically between the two of us, reminding me of Sonya Karp when she started going, well, a bit crazy. Rose narrowed her eyes at her in confusion, but stayed braced against the doorway, blocking Tasha's entrance into her room.

"You can have him." Tasha bit out darkly. "He never loved me anyway." With that, she stormed off down the hall, past the watching eyes, peering out from their rooms.

I sighed, and my shoulders slumped. I knew it wasn't wise to chase after her, she needed to calm down. Lissa appeared at the doorway.

"I've rung down to Alberta, telling her about the situation with Tasha. She's alerted all the guards, so they'll keep an eye on her until she calms down."

"Thank you Lady Dragomir. Much appreciated." My voice was noticeably quieter than normal, and I saw Lissa's worried eyes flick to Rose, then back to me. A small nod of Rose's head told me that Lissa was asking Rose something. I felt like I was intruding on their wordless communication, and I turned to start to back away.

Seeing my movements, Rose walked quickly towards me. "Dimitri, wait."

She looked worried. _Strange, she wasn't too bothered about my feelings earlier, _I thought bitterly. Still, it was nice to know she still cared, and it filled me with a small glimmer of hope that pushed aside my feelings of betrayal.

"You look exhausted. You should sleep, it's been an abnormally long, stressful day."

My mind flickered back to the scene in the ballroom, and my stomach turned violently.

"I don't think I'll be sleeping tonight." I admitted, trying to make light of the fact I was sure that image would plague me until I died.

Rose laughed lightly. "I know the feeling. Want to go for a walk around the grounds? Clear our heads."

I nodded, admittedly quite surprised at the turn this evening had taken. We'd fought less than 2 hours previous, and 10 minutes ago my charge had been beating down her door and calling her a bloodwhore.

We walked down the stairs and out the side door in silence. It wasn't until the cool air hit us, that what had just happened started to sink in. It felt like some strange nightmare.

* * *

><p>"I'm sorry, about Tasha. I don't understand what got into her..."<p>

"It's ok." Rose said kindly. "You didn't make her do all that crazy stuff, so it's not your fault."

I lowered my head. "I did though, Roza. I told her I didn't want to be her guardian anymore."

Rose's head snapped up to look at me, her eyes squinted in confusion. The wind whipped her dark hair into a frenzy around her head, and distracted me from what I had planned to say.

"What? Why? You can't leave her Dimitri, that's against your oath."

"Tasha is a royal, and she will find another guardian easily. Especially with all that's happening now; I'm sure there are many a guardian looking for a safer place to retreat to. But that's not me. I don't want to hide away with her, whilst Court goes up in flames. I'm not a coward."

Rose's eyes drifted to the ebony sky above us. "No, comrade, you certainly aren't."

We sat in a companionable silence. My thoughts drifted to what would happen now. A replacement guardian would be found, and then I suspect Tasha would leave. When she saw sense, she would be embarrassed by the spectacle she caused earlier, and it was very much like Tasha to run and hide.

"I'm sorry too." Rose said quietly.

I hadn't expected that. Rose very rarely apologised, even back when I knew her, and something told me it was an even rarer occurrence now.

"For what?" I stammered out. _Good one Dimitri._

"For what I said earlier. About not wanting you here. I do." Rose's voice was quite, but passionate. She still avoided my eyes though.

"And I'm sorry for what I said. I shouldn't have called you heartless, it wasn't fair. I know everything that happened was hard on you."

"I'm fine, Dimitri." She said in the same quiet voice.

"No, you're not. And that's understandable. The threat on the royals is bad at the moment, and it's even worse for Lissa. You're her guardian, and you don't need me bringing up our relationship all the time. You were right with what you said before. You don't need me."

I stood up, and looked down at her confused face. "I need to keep you safe, Roza. Which is why I'm staying. I also need you to keep Lissa safe. Which is why I'll do as you asked. I'll avoid you, from now on."

It took all the self control I had, to turn away from her sad eyes, and walk out of the cold.


	8. Chapter 8

**Hey, new chapter, tried to update quicker than last time ;) Hope you enjoy this, this chapter actually turned out okay, so I would love to hear if you think the same!**

**Also, I do have some of the next chapter prewritten, in which 1 of 2 things could happen. It'll probably make it easier to decide if someone, anyone, could give me a hint as to what if your favourite thing in the story, so I can pick :)**

**Rebecca x**

* * *

><p>Which is how I ended up in the gym in the morning, beating the crap out of a poor defenseless mannequin.<p>

On the one hand, I felt like an idiot. I had said I would fight for her, and here I was, backing out of the fight before it had even begun. But still, I understood why I had to do it. Lissa. Tasha. All the royals at court. All the moroi in general.

"They come first." I muttered under my breath as I swung out a right hook into the dummy's blank orange face.

I took a few steps back, and sighed deeply. It was almost time for breakfast, and then I was to pack up and get the car to court. I had some explaining to do about the situation with Tasha. That should be fun.

In an hour, I was packed up and ready to leave. I hadn't really had many things with me; I had packed lightly, thinking it was a short trip. Tasha had had her belongings picked up and taken back to her house up north at some point in the morning whilst I was at the gym. She clearly didn't want to speak to me, and I wasn't going to push it. Drawing out my departure would only make it more painful for the both of us.

I loaded myself into the car, and as it pulled out of the Academy gates, I thought of Rose. I imagined she would want Lissa to stay there for a few days, until the mess was cleaned up at Court - figuratively and literally. But then, she would also return, and we would have to see each other every day. My stomach turned at the idea; I wasn't sure how strong my restraint was, or how easily she would make me cave. Plus, after abandoning her for a second time, I was dubious as to how Rose would act around me.

I knew I should probably use this time in the car to sleep, having not had much after my conversation with Rose last night. But not sleeping was ingrained into my head; it was just as if I was on duty again.

_But you're not protecting anyone anymore, are you Dimitri? _The malicious voice in my head whispered meanly. _You've given up on that._

I made a promise, then, that when I got to court, I would be useful. No more running, no more hiding, no more being a failure as a guardian. I would be strong this time, and protect the Moroi.

_They come first._

We pulled up at Court about an hour and a half later, and I was increasingly tense. I hadn't slept at all, and my muscles hurt from tensing them in the same position for so long. I stood and stretched, as one of the workers at court hurried to empty the car of my belongings and show me to my new room. My meeting with the Royals, and Tatiana, was in an hour, which gave me time to unpack. That is, if I thought I was staying. I wasn't really sure what they would do with me.

I hoped they would find a position for me, maybe as a tutor as I had been for Rose, or as a teacher of younger dhampires. Maybe I could even work in security, as long as I was helping people.

* * *

><p>The hour passed quickly as I emptied my suitcases of my limited belongings from the Academy, and the suitcases Tasha had had sent here. She clearly hadn't been careful with my stuff, but who could blame her? "You messed up, Dimitri." I muttered darkly as I pulled out the messy pile that was my boxer shorts.<p>

A knock on the door startled me out of my musings. I ditched my creased clothing in it's pile, and pulled open the door. Hans was stood there, quietly terrifying in his presence.

"Tatiana will see you now." He said, smiling slightly in recognition.

I nodded, and closed the door behind me and followed him to the great hall.

It was much changed from when I last saw it. Obviously, the fire and blood was gone, but still, it was all I could see when I closed my eyes. The burning and the smoke and the screams, all brought to the forefront of my mind by the swirling mosaic on the floor.

"Guardian Belikov." I was greeted by a woman sat next to Tatiana as I walked into the room. She looked smart and severe, in a dark coloured dress suit. She was wholly different to Tatiana, who sat in the normal bright royal garments for a queen, with a face filled with emotion.

"Take a seat." The woman's voice had no warmth in it, but it was hardly rude. She was simply methodical in her job, I presumed, and wanted to have this meeting over with as soon as possible.

I sat smoothly, and looked around. There were representatives from most royal families, except a few, including the Ozera's and the Dragomir's. This wasn't a surprise. Even if the two families had not been connected to me, all royals had the right to miss court proceedings, after being subjected to that attack. However, there were enough to pass a vote, which I suppose is all Tatiana wanted and needed.

"You come before us, Dimitri Belikov, because you have abandoned your post as primary guardian of Princess Ozera. Is that the case?" The woman continued in the same, unemotional voice.

"Yes ma'am." I said, as steadily as I could hope for.

"And what were the reasons behind this decision?" Tatiana spoke loudly. The woman next to her had clearly not expected the queen to speak, but she covered her surprise well, and simply began sorting through papers on her lap, and let the queen have the floor. I paused to structure my words; I knew it was important that the queen understand me.

"I felt I could be of more use here, in court. I understand Lady Ozera needs a guardian, but I think someone else may be of more use than myself. I want to help protect people here."

Tatiana nodded. I couldn't tell if she was pleased with my response or not, but her eyes lowered to the floor in contemplation. The woman next to her began again with her questioning.

"Were you present at the time of the Strigoi attack, during which Lady Ozera used Moroi magic in the presence of the Strigoi attackers?"

"I was." I nodded. "It was very brave of her, and I understand that she has now become a target for the Strigoi, and will need more supervision. However, I don't.."

"What do you suggest we do, Guardian Belikov, with both Princess Ozera and yourself?" The queen interrupted again. She had a small frown on her face.

I suddenly considered how this must look. After becoming an obvious target for the next Strigoi attack, I was coming before the court to ask to be transferred.

"I suggest, with all due respect, your majesty, that you find Lady Ozera a new guardian. Perhaps even two; and keep them in hiding, where it is unlikely the Strigoi will find them. With myself, I ask graciously that you put me in a place that requires the most help. I wish to help, your majesty; to prevent such a travesty from even occurring again. Please."

Tatiana's eyes flew to mine on the last word. She paused for what felt like an eternity, and then stood gracefully.

"Guardian Belikov, I admire you. Many guardians are looking to get away from court, yet you stand before me asking to be brought closer to the centre of destruction. Yes, I admire you.

I am also aware that you are brave. And strong. And a talented guardian. And I commend you for looking for a better use of your talent. Thus, I put to you this offer."

Tatiana stopped addressing me, and now turned to the rest of the royals at court.

"With the blessing of this court, I place upon you a great task. It will be long hours, hard work. You may wish you had stayed with Lady Ozera when you had the chance. Along with another guardian," - she paused with a smirk - "of my choosing, you will train a new recruitment of 50 novice dhampires. You will mould them into great guardians. You will also need to run 8 hour security runs and the like, as we are short staffed. And you will stay at court."

The royals around the room nodded; clearly the idea of having an extra guardian around at court was in all of their best interests.

The woman next to Tatiana nodded again. Emotionless as she was, it still struck me that she seemed happy with the verdict.

"Then it's settled then. Go and unpack your things, Guardian Belikov. And welcome to court."

* * *

><p>After I had finished unpacking, I was escorted into a massive, beige coloured gym. It was bright and polished, nothing like the gym at the Academy. It had much more equipment than the Academy too, and was definitely a much better place to train. I relished the opportunity to make use of it, but in the pit of my stomach I still felt uneasy.<p>

This job sounded like a lot of pressure. And I wasn't exactly known for being a people person. During the rest of the evening, I was showed to what I presumed were the 'need to know' locations around court; the rest were off limits. And then I went to sleep, fitfully dreaming of my new partner, my new job, and of Rose, and how her and Lissa were coping.

The next morning, I was woken up by the alarm at the side of my bed at 6am. tired and grumpy, I stumbled out into the hallway, and straight into the broad shoulders of Hans.

"What the hell is going on?" I murmured, my voice husky with sleep.

"Training for all the guardians happens at 6am, every morning," he said, "get dressed."

Hurriedly, I dressed in a black t-shirt and black sweats, and combed my hair roughly downwards. I was downstairs in front of Hans in 5 minutes, but he still looked annoyed, and I presumed I was last to join.

"4 miles around the track, 50 push up, 50 sit ups, then repeat. She'll be down here in an hour so I suggest you get a move on." Hans barked from the front of the room.

Before I could question who she was, or even blink, the rest of the recruits were speeding towards the exit.

I kept up for most of the first round. But by the second, I was dead. I was one of the last 20 or so to finish my sit ups, when Hans announced that 'it had been decided' there was to be another 2 mile run, because we didn't all complete it in the hour.

I'll admit, I was tired and kinda pissed off. On my way around the track, I ended up running side by side with another guardian who I recognised from my day in front of Tatiana.

"Hey. Any chance you know who picks these warmups? This is intense." My voice sounded weak as I struggled to talk and breathe.

"The head of training at court. And be quiet, she'll kill us if we're caught talking." The man muttered quietly, talking out of one corner of his mouth.

"What? We can't talk either?" I snorted incredulously. "It's like army boot camp"

A tall, square shouldered man in front spun around, and started running backwards. He had short shaved hair, fitting in perfectly with his camouflage sweats and wifebeater.

"Hey, asshat. Shut the hell up. You're already lagging behind, don't want you getting us in more trouble." His voice was commanding and condescending, and it pissed me off.

He then spun back around, and continued running. "What's he, the quarter back?" I snorted, loud enough for him to hear me.

The tall man was on me before I could even lower my eyebrows. I felt his weight pin me to the ground, and then the blow of his fists into my face. It took 3 other guardians to pull him off me, but none of them seemed too surprised at his behavior.

It wasn't until a shadow passed over my head that I realised I was still laying flat on the floor in shock. A combat boot, covered in mud, came thudding down on my chest, shocking me out of my incredulous musings over the idea of a guardian attacking another guardian. My eyes flickered up to see light shining off the all too familiar shimmering dark hair and tight black leather. I groaned inwardly.

"Welcome to boot camp, Belikov."


	9. Chapter 9

Rose. She was smirking slightly, and once I'd pushed myself up and righted myself, I understood why.

Unlike the rest of the guardians, who were all wearing different types of sporting clothes, Rose was wearing the same clothes at Hans, the most noticeable of which was the leather jacket with the royal crest on. It became clear that Rose was the 'she' everyone had been talking about. She ran the training for court guardians. Which I suppose explained why everyone was so afraid.

Two things suddenly became very clear. The first was that Rose now owned me from 6-8am every morning, perhaps even longer. A very pissed off Rose, I would imagine, after Tasha's stunt at the Academy, and then the one I pulled - leaving her again. I was on thin ice at Court anyway; she could have me do whatever she wanted me to do, and I couldn't complain.

The second thing? Rose clearly knew this too. And was very pleased about it.

I laughed nervously, and ran a hand through my hair. She was still smirking, but it was a condescending smirk, as if she was waiting for me to stop being so childish.

"If you boys are done play wrestling, I suppose it would be apt if you did some real fighting for the rest of your allotted time. Hans, pair everyone up please?"

Hans started grabbing people by the shoulders and shoving them together roughly. The pairs of people just followed his shove without quarrel. When he got to me, Rose raised a hand, and he moved on immediately. I tried to hide the panic in my eyes as I stepped towards her. _She was going to be my partner?_ She looked amused at my apparently obvious display of fear, however, showing my attempts at masking it had failed.

"Don't panic, Dimitri. I won't hurt you too bad." She smirked, her voice condescending and cold.

I smiled warily, avoiding her eyes. Once everyone was in pairs, Hans stepped back.

"Now," Rose said loudly, "I want you to do all your fighting without stakes today. Although you should always keep one on your person, if somehow you lose your stake in a fight you need to know how to deal without one."

"Number yourselves 1 and 2. Number 1, you're attacking, number 2, you're defending." She clapped her hands, and everyone sprung into action immediately.

She moved slowly until she was only a few inches from my face, and whispered harshly, "I'm number one."

I backed off, and nodded, dropping into a defensive stance. I was on high alert; I wasn't going to give her the satisfaction of beating the crap out of me - knowing her, she'd enjoy it far too much. So when she swung a hand out to my head, I grabbed her wrist and pushed it away. When she swung her leg around I smacked it down with my palm, hard.

I tried not to think about how it was Rose, and pictured the burly man from earlier being the one who was attacking me. It made everything seem clearer; I wasn't fighting the girl of my dreams, I was fighting a 7ft tall asshole with a god complex.

She was fast - at least 3 moves a second I'd say - which made her pretty hard to keep track of. Still, I tried my best, and after a while it stopped being an exercise, and became an actual fight, a battle for superiority. I stopped just trying to defend, and started to fight back, until she and I were simply caught up in a brawl. I could no longer pretend she was the asshole from earlier; all her moves were familiar, and felt like Rose. I saw the other guards start to stop and gather round out of the corner of my eye, but could hardly spare any attention for them. As always, she commanded my whole attention.

She'd swing out a kick that was stronger than it needed to be for an exercise, and in truth, I was doing the same. It was as if we were trying to hurt each other as much as possible in the short time we were allowed together. Punch, kick, block, faster and harder, over, and over, and over.

It felt like a routine, like back in the old days, neither of us winning or losing. That is, until Rose snapped. She groaned loudly, almost like a snarl, and pulled a stake out of her leather jacket, obviously frustrated by the back and forth. Quicker than I would have thought possible, she had it pinned right above my heart. My hand flew out to catch it, and ended up folded over hers; if I hadn't moved fast enough, I don't know if she would have stabbed me or not..

The cool metal of the stake pressed against my chest seemed to freeze the moment in time. We were both breathing hard, and she was flushed in the face. I hadn't moved my hand yet, and truth be told, I didn't want to. My heart was beating fast, but I felt like that was the only part of me that was moving.

_I really, really want to kiss her._

I can't tell you how long we stood there, inches apart and breathing hard. It wasn't until we noticed that all the other guards had stopped, and were stood in a circle watching us, that we stepped hastily apart.

"Get back to work!" Rose commanded loudly, before turning to me and gesturing towards Hans. "Work with him." She said breathily, her eyes avoiding me, before stalking away.

* * *

><p>The rest of the training passed uneventfully, and then we were ushered up to shower. There was a lot of whispering between the other guardians - apparently, Rose never fought with the a guardian in training before. I received a few inquiries as to how I knew 'Guardian Hathaway', but no one was rude about it, and no one persisted when I gave them a short, nondescript answer. Except for the man from earlier.<p>

"So that's why you got to skip induction training. Banging the teacher, are you? I'll let you in on a secret, Belikov, from the looks of her right hook, I don't think she's that into you." The man taunted with an ugly smirk as he packed his clothes into his locker.

I sighed, before closing my locker to head out the door. "Some of us don't need to sleep our way into the programme. Some of us are just _that _good." I spoke bluntly, but was careful not to taint my voice with the malice I felt. I didn't want to stoop to his level.

"I didn't sleep with Hathaway to get in here!" He said indignantly, slamming his locker door shut.

"Now, now, I did _not _say that, did I?" I said, speaking as though I was talking to a child in the middle of a tantrum.

I walked closer to him a little, under the pretense of picking up my bottle. In truth, I just wanted him to know I wasn't scared of him, not even a little.

"Besides," I said with a smirk up at him, before turning on my heel and walking out the room, "how unlikely does that sound?" I swung the door open and left, the rest of the guys laughing behind me.

On the walk out, I saw Rose standing on the edge of the field. Hans wasn't there anymore - in fact, there was no one around. I considered going over to speak to her, but upon a quick glance at my watch, I realised I was late to meet Tatiana for my assignments for the day. So I kept my head down, and my feet quick. Best not to tempt fate.

It was then that I remembered the second half of my deal. I had to train the newly inducted guardian recruits for Court. And I was to have a partner. I drew my eyes away and walked in the direction of Tatiana's chambers. Who the hell were they going to partner me with?

Upon arrival, I recognised some of the guards outside the door as some that were present during the training session. I thought briefly as to how they had got up here so quickly, and decided I should probably spend less time participating in locker room talk, and more time focussing on work, if I was to survive here.

The guards opened the doors for me, which was unexpected. Like I was a guest, not a disgraced guardian. Entering cautiously, I looked up at the orate ceiling and eyed the extravagant furniture, and was so entranced by them, I almost missed Tatiana, sat along the left side of the room.

"Hello Dimitri." She said pleasantly, and she and her assistant walked forward. I looked at the assistant, remembering her from my court hearing and seeing she still seemed shy and a little scared - the complete opposite to Tatiana. I began to wonder how on earth she survived such long periods by the Queen's side, but my train of thought was cut off by Tatiana's commanding voice.

"Fiona here will be your partner for training the new recruits." Tatiana said, seeming slightly smug. The pretty, timid girl nodded slightly, eyes flicking from Tatiana to myself in quick succession.

"What?" I stuttered, before I could stop myself. Neither the girl nor Tatiana looks perturbed by my response - maybe they too saw how ludicrous this sounds. The girl was small, and although not too skinny, hardly muscular. She looks like a good kick in the stomach would snap her in two, and frankly, I can't imagine her knowing all too much about fighting.

"You can fight?" I said, trying to mask my surprise with a genuine interest in her life. Maybe she'll think I'm being charming. She seemed to misinterpret this as some attempt at flirting - or maybe she's just so nervous about speaking to people - as she blushes a deep pink and her eyes flick nervously to Tatiana.

"A little." She said simply, before raising a surprisingly steady hand. "Hi," she says sweetly, "I'm Fiona."

Fiona was plain, but not bad looking. In fairness, my experience with girls was pretty much limited to Rose, and not everyone had such good genetics. I'd met Guardian Hathaway - I knew where Rose got her looks from.

"Dimitri." I said with a smile; the first smile that wasn't entirely fake in a few days. She seems sweet and kind, and almost like a china doll that could break any minute. She's the exact opposite of Rose.

_Maybe that's what you need..._

Dragging my thoughts away from the comparisons between Rose and Fiona, I turned back to Tatiana.

"When do we start?" I asked, all business now.

"Now, Belikov. The new recruits are waiting in the gym." Upon finishing the sentence, Tatiana turned with a flourish of robes, and headed towards the entrance to her quarters. "Look after him, Miss Magdalin."

Fiona blushed again, and lowered her gaze. She offered no reply, which made me laugh slightly.

"Come on." I offered politely after a few seconds of uncomfortable silence after the door slammed shut. "Lets go meet the newbies."

* * *

><p>Fiona followed by my side all the way down to the gym, and offered light murmurs or nods of her head to all the none committal remarks I made about the castle and the staff. Although she didn't speak much, I found myself a little uneasy about her. It felt like the calm before the storm, somehow. As if at any moment, she was going to turn around and bite my head off. <em>Maybe I've spent too much time with Rose...<em> I thought. Realising how stupid it was to be so scared of such a small little creature, I held open the door to the gym for her and smiled, albeit awkwardly.

Following into after her, I saw a large groups of recruits, gathered at the back of the hall in a clump. A few are stretching, but most were gathered at the back and talking animatedly amongst themselves. I took a moment to stand there, in silence, and look them over a few times. Out of the group, most of the recruits look to be in decent shape, which is always good. In truth, I wasn't sure who we'd be working with, and it was a small relief to know I wouldn't not training people from scratch.

A few students looked my way, and hastily dropped what they were holding and smartened themselves up. Some were too lost in their conversations to notice. I just stood there, hands clasped tight behind my back, and watched as a ripple of realisation went through the crowd. Soon they were all stood facing me, in complete silence.

I raised my eyebrows, and made the sweep of my eyes over each recruit painfully obvious. A few stared back defiantly, others squirmed uncomfortably under my gaze. I'm certain I heard one boy actually whimper.

"The idea that most of you will become guardians is misconceived." I said, my voice loud in the quiet room, and - if I do say it myself - authoritative. "Some will switch to guard training, and there is no shame in that. Some will switch to surveillance or even.." I pause with a sniff, "Maintenance." A few of the larger boys scoffed at that, which earned them a hard glare.

"It's going to be hard. You're going to despise every inch of my being for the next six weeks, and I'm not going to care. This isn't the Academy. You're no longer competing with each other." I paused.

"You're fighting Strigoi."

There was a murmur through the crowd; some worried, some excited. I stood still until it had finished, and once there was silence again, a tall boy near the front raised a tentative hand. I nodded to let him know he has permission to speak.

"So, it's.. um, it's true?" He said, clearly a little nervous, but valiantly trying not to show it. His eyes were unsteady as they tried to meet mine, but I wondered if this was a reaction to the topic he was talking about, or me.

"Is what true?" I said, the authority in my voice replaced by genuine curiosity. I began to wonder if he was talking, as the other guardians had in the changing room, about my relationship with Rose...

"That there was a Strigoi attack on Court." He murmured, clearly a little shocked that I didn't know what he was talking about. _Ahh..._

My eyebrows rose and fell in realisation. I understood now. Clearly, Tatiana had made an attempt to cover up the attack, or at least change the story to one that would cause less panic. A poor attempt at that - clearly rumours were circulating; people knew about the attack anyway.

My silence had not gone un-noticed, and students were beginning to look uncomfortable, or worried. Before I had chance to speak, a small voice pipe up from behind me.

"Yes." Fiona said, a little high pitched and clearly uncomfortable being under the scrutiny of 20 or so gazes.

The murmur went through again, this time slightly louder. Fiona's gaze dropped to the floor as she spoke next.

"Yes, there was an attack." Her voice was calm, but looking at the floor and fiddling with her hands wasn't putting the students at ease.

I clapped my hands, the slapping noise reverberating around the gym. There was silence straight away, and nervous eyes flickered up to watch me.

"It's clear that none of you know exactly what happened that day. In truth, I'm not even certain myself. But it's imperative that you know at least the basics. You cannot defend people against what you don't understand."

I paused. Going through this was not something I had wanted to do, and even though I knew it was important, I didn't want to have to relive the memories.

"The Strigoi that attacked were newborns. Strigoi that have only recently turned. At that point, they don't understand their own strength, and it was clear that no one had bothered to teach them. Never the less, they were still overpowering us, due to their massive numbers, and the surprise of their attack. We weren't prepared.

"It was.. brutal. And we lost many lives. And it was clearly orchestrated by someone out to get the Queen and the Moroi."

I took another breath, knowing this was what would be most important.

"The only reason we survived as we did, was Moroi magic."

There was an small intake of breath from a few of the female guards, and many looked confused.

"But Moroi don't use their magic that way." The boy said, seeming baffled by the idea of Moroi fighting. In truth, I could see why. When being trained as a guardian, we are almost lead to believe Moroi are weak, and cannot defend themselves. Although not true, it's ingrained into our mind. We're taught to put them first over everything, even our own lives. The idea of Tasha fighting still seemed mad to me.

"Well, they did that day. The bravest Moroi I'd ever seen." I sighed again. Their faces were as conflicted as I felt. An advantage over the Strigoi was something we looked for everywhere, and now that we had one, we were supposed to let it sit there and do nothing?

"I'm telling you this because the Strigoi will come for them. Magic wielding Moroi were a danger to them originally, but now whoever started this knows they'll use it to fight against him, they are a bigger risk than ever."

"The Strigoi will come here, and they will try to murder or capture our Moroi. And they wont hesitate to kill you to do it." I paced over to a wooden crate, picked it up, and dropped it at the feet of the closest recruit. "Unless you defend yourself."

Kicking it open, there were stakes, lined up neatly in a row like toy soldiers. The recruit in front of me made a grab down, and soon, everyone followed. It wasn't clear whether they'd held one before or not until I saw a girl holding one the wrong way round. I sighed, and Fiona, following my gaze, giggled.

I had almost forgotten she was there throughout my speech. Watching her from the corner of my eye, I noticed how nervous the stakes seemed to make her. I could understand why, maybe. She probably hadn't been around them much, and I attributed her nerves to the possibility of an accident happening.

* * *

><p>The rest of the session passed almost uneventfully. A young recruit almost stabbed himself in the eye with his own stake trying to be clever, and as the lesson went on, Fiona's nerves seemed to increase, to the point at which I was almost tempted to cut the lesson short. After I had dismissed the recruits, I went over to speak to her.<p>

"Are you alright?" I asked, trying to sound concerned and not just simply curious. She had been facing away from me, and as she turned, I saw her try to calm her facial expression.

"Fine." She answered, her voice a little rough, but convincing.

"Are you sure?" I asked, taking a step forward. She was so small, so fragile. She reminded me of my sisters; not because they were weak or scared, but because in my eyes, both needed protecting for one reason or another. It was something I'd never really had to deal with with Rose.

Fiona nodded, and looked up at me. I became more aware of our proximity, wondering if it was her or I that was moving closer. I didn't have long to ponder it though, before the door of the gym swung open.

"Oh" said a voice from the door, "Sorry, forgot it was date night."

Rose.

I moved back from Fiona so fast that the poor girl looked terrified. "Rose." I greeted cooly, not daring myself to raise my eyes from Fiona's and look into hers.

"No, don't mind me." She said, faux cheerful as she walked further into the room and unceremoniously dumped her bag by the mat. Chancing a glance up, I saw her glaring daggers at a nervous looking Fiona. Rose's eyes trailed up and down Fiona, almost as if she was assessing her as a threat, and Fiona shifted uncomfortably under her gaze. I felt bad for the poor girl. Those who weren't used to dealing with Rose usually had a problem with that glare.

"We were just leaving." I said bluntly, drawing her attention away from the poor girl. Rose's eyes flickered to mine, the narrowing of her eyes barely relaxing before it was back in full force. Rose cocked an eyebrow, and nodded towards the door.

"Right you are, comrade." She said, her voice still with the same fake cheer. It made me uncomfortable to hear it, and I couldn't get out of the room faster.

Me and Fiona went our separate ways then, the atmosphere awkward as we departed. It didn't cross my mind until later that evening - in truth, nothing but Rose crossed my mind for a good few hours - that maybe Fiona was offended by how I'd almost shoved her out of the room as soon as Rose appeared. It had been for her own good, granted...

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><p>I fell into a less than easy sleep at around 11, and for some reason, couldn't shake the thoughts of Fiona and Rose. In the haze between sleeping and awake, I compared the two of them,thinking of all their pros and cons. By the next morning, I had a headache, bags under my eyes, and absolutely no idea what was going on in either of their heads. Or, in fact, my own.<p>

I didn't make it down to breakfast - even though I desperately wanted to. Before I'd even fully descended the stairs, I was flung flush against the wall of the staircase.

"Rose, what the hell?" I breathed, the wind knocked out of me. I had a firm hold on her waist, and her hands were across my shoulders - the position was compromising, but she held the power here. I was trapped. Not that I was complaining, however.

"Calm yourself Comrade, I'm just here for a friendly chat." She spoke quietly, like a mother would to a petulant child. Her eyes sparkled with mischief, but underneath it, I saw something a little different.

"What is it, Rose?" I asked, my curiosity spiked. I tried to shift but she held me firm, before leaning in to whisper in my ear.

This was far past compromising. This was dangerous ground - the last time I was here, it didn't end well. I froze still, afraid to breath unless I did something I didn't want - or she didn't want. My hands on her hips gripped harder subconsciously, and I felt her breath hitch.

"Stay away from Fiona, Dimitri. She's trouble." Rose breathed, her words firm even without volume.

As she stepped away, it took me a while to process what she had said. "Wait, what?" I said, incredulous. "You can't weigh in on the women I do and do not speak to!" I pushed myself off the wall, and moved to follow her.

"I just get a bad feeling around her Dimitri." Rose said, as if it were the most logical thing in the world.

"God, you're being ridiculous, Roza. That girl's like a kitten, or a butterfly. She couldn't hurt anyone." I sighed, running a hand through my hair. A part of me wondered if Rose was jealous, or if she just wanted to make my life as miserable as possible.

"I'm not going to stay away from her just because you don't like her, Rose." I said defiantly. In truth, I hadn't actually planned on seeing Fiona more than I had to, with training and the like, but now I felt like proclaiming my undying love for her in the middle of the dining hall, if only to see Rose's reaction.

If she was jealous, it meant she cared.

"Dimitri.." Rose began, before pausing, rolling her eyes, and stopping herself. "You know what, fine. She'll bore you in a week, tops." She smiled an evil, smug smile, flipped her long hair over her shoulders, and continued down the stairs.

"I'll save you some pancakes, Comrade."


	10. Chapter 10

**Still alive. Still do have plans to finish this, at some point, I promise. If there's anyone still there - or even if there isn't - the story will be completed. Promise! And it does get good.**

**Send me a review, because I'd love to hear the opinion on this chapter. It might not be to everyone's taste, but there's a happy D&R ending at the very end of this story, promise!**

-**R**

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><p>Rose hadn't been kidding. By the time I got into the hall for breakfast, after a good minute of pacing in the hallway trying to calm myself down, she had indeed left me pancakes on the top of my placemat. I smiled as I sat down to eat them. Maybe she didn't hate me after all.<p>

Well, if she didn't hate me at the start of breakfast, she probably did by the end. Guardians and their Moroi were expected to sit together, and even though the only reason I was even at court was because I didn't have a charge - a fact that, judging by everyone's stares, people were aware of - I'd still been given an empty seat next to me. It had sat empty for the last few days, but today, Tatiana clearly fancied to play some royal games.

Not bothering to include myself in the conversation on my table, I stayed quiet and kept my eye on the room, scanning carefully. Even without Tanya, I still liked to be aware of things - and my meeting with Rose this morning had left me more jumpy than normal. What had she meant, Fiona was trouble? I wanted to pretend it was just jealousy on Rose's part. In fact, the idea of Rose being jealous of another woman, who may or may not be interested in me, gave me a little flutter in my stomach.

It was then I noticed Fiona being called over to the Queen. She sat with the other members of the royal chamber and housing staff, on a table to our right. The Queen leant slightly down from her throne, leaving Fiona to stretch the rest of the distance, and whispered something in Fiona's ear. Her doe eyes went wide, and travelled slowly towards me. Our eyes met, and I gave a brief smile, which she returned nervously. I took a sip of my juice and chanced a glance at over at the door, where Rose was stood.

Maybe she had thought I hadn't noticed her arrive, or maybe she was just shocked I had the balls to openly look at her, to smile at her, but her eyes widened as she caught my gaze. She pursed her lips slightly, nodding her head before her eyes tracked back towards Lissa, sat at the Royal table with Tatiana. I sighed quietly. Things were getting far too complicated, and my decision to return to court was starting to look like a worse idea as the seconds tracked by.

I stared back down at my pancakes, shoveling bites into my mouth in the hope I could get out of there before whatever plan Tatiana was orchestrating came to be. Unfortunately, I wasn't quick enough. "Hey, Dimitri, looks like you have an admirer." Someone called quietly from the end of the table - one of the guardians from training earlier yesterday. I looked up to find Fiona stood by the empty chair, bright red in the face and shaking her head slowly. "I'm sorry." She muttered, glancing back up at the Queen. "She can be.."

"Unreasonable." I finished for her, removing my jacket from the chair and pulling it out for her. "Just sit here for today." I said, tidying up my mess so she had room. I didn't dare look at Rose at the door again, again, but apparently Fiona was braver than she looked.

"That girl from the other day in the gym, she's staring at me." Fiona whispered, tilting her head towards me so others wouldn't hear.

"Rose. She's an old friend. And she's not.. _staring_." I said, apologetically.

Fiona raised an eyebrow at me, more playfully than I would have expected from her, and giggled. "No, you're right," She said, nodding her head towards Rose, "she's glaring." I laughed quietly.

"Maybe." I said with a smile, turning back to my breakfast in the hope it would end the conversation. Discussing Rose with anyone was something I just simply wasn't comfortable with.

Fiona didn't push further, and Rose soon slipped from the room. As I dragged the remainder of my pancakes around my plate, mopping up the last of my syrup, I reverted back to my conversationless way. Judging by the daggers the Queen was sending us, that wasn't what she had in mind when she sent Fiona over here. I saw the Queen nod vigorously at Fiona in the corner of my eye, and heard a quiet sigh to my side.

"The Queen said you missed your Guardian training today, is everything alright?" Fiona asked. I nodded, my mouth full, and swallowed, trying to decide whether what I said now would be retold to the Queen at a later date. I decided I didn't care, and ran a hand through my hair as I spoke. "Overslept. Didn't feel very well last night." I brushed my hands down my combats, avoiding eye contact with both Fiona, and our Royal eavesdrop.

Fiona nodded. "So it wasn't because you found out the guardian training was run by your glare-y friend?" She was smiling as she said it, probably thinking it was okay to joke about Rose like this, but something felt weird about the conversation, her questions, especially with the Queen having sent her here. What did Tatiana want to know? "Guardian Hathaway is _more_ than competent," I said bluntly. "I'm sure I'll learn a great deal from her at training tomorrow, and all the mornings after." I said with a smile, turning away and effectively ending the conversation.

Fiona was no longer chatty, and I wasn't interested in starting up another conversation. As much as I wanted to torture Rose, that wasn't why I'd come back. I didn't want her to suffer, I wanted her back. Maybe. Or maybe I just wanted to clear the air, for her to be happy. But flirting with pretty brunettes wasn't going to help me in either case.

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><p>When I finished the last of my pancakes, I pushed my chair back with a squeak. "Best be off." I said to Fiona, patting her once on the shoulder awkwardly and backing away. "I'll see you soon, yes?" I said, giving her a mock salute. She coloured and smiled.<p>

"Yeah, alright." She said, turning back to her food. I glanced around the room finally, and caught the eye of Lissa, who had clearly risen when she'd seen I was leaving. I wasn't interested in another lecture on who I should and shouldn't trust, or a reminder of how badly I'd screwed up with Rose, but it would have been impolite to ignore her. When she reached me, we were out of the hall and in a corridor. It had few windows, and the shadows cast across Lisa's face made her look tired and sad.

"Lissa.." I began, but I was cut off before I could finish.

"Let me get this straight." Lissa said, with as much malice as such a small blonde could muster. "You first swan back into the academy with the woman you left Rose for, kiss Rose _twice_, say you're going to fight for her, then change your mind, and then turn up at the place we work and throw your _new_ girl in her face?" Lisa frowned, coming closing and pointing a finger at me. "You've got a _lot_ of nerve."

"You're forgetting," I said, as calmly as I could muster, "that Rose rejected me on both occasions, told me not to bother fighting for her, and it was because of Rose I'm here without a charge in the first place. And Fiona isn't my girl, she's just someone I work with. There is no competition, and there's no 'throwing'. They're both just two women I work with."

I stepped backwards, wanting out of this situation as soon as possible. "She told me to stop fighting, that she wasn't interested.."

Lissa held up a palm. "You said you would fight for her forever. Then the next day, you give up. She was just beginning to get used to the idea you were back, and then you bailed. God!" Lissa shrugged dramatically. "You kids need to sort your shit out, and quickly. We all have bigger problems."

I blinked as Lissa walked away. I had never heard the blonde swear before. Clearly my actions had had a bit of an impact already.

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><p>As I climbed the stairs, I realised the truth in Lissa's words. I had turned up in Rose's life again, tried to get her back for about 15 minutes, and then given up. As always, I was freaking out and backing off. More than that, there had been a Strigoi attack on Court that left us massively understaffed and underprepared, and should there be another one, we were all doomed.<p>

I reached the door to my room, but as I turned the handle, I didn't want to go in. I clicked it shut, and leant my head against it. This was all just one big mess. I had been someone with power and determination before, and now I was losing it over a girl. No, this ended now. I was hear to do a job. That's all.

The attack was the reason I was here. I needed to keep everyone safe - Rose included. All this stressing over my love life would be for nothing if she and Lissa were dead by the end of the month at the hands of the undead.

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><p>Two hours later, I was back in the gym. I'd run 10 miles, and had my novices do the same, and then we'd done some stretching exercises and stake work. Most were collapsed on the floor, and Fiona was handing out bottles of water to the worse for wear looking recruits. Through the bay window at the top of the training hall, I spotted Rose running, accompanied by a tall, muscular man I remembered as Hans. They ran our regular track, and I watched them silently as Fiona had the novices practice on mannequins. When they were busy, she slid up next to me on the bench.<p>

"You stare as much as she does, you'd make a good couple" She said knowingly, handing me a bottle of water. I nodded once, not taking my eyes off the window. Rose was standing only a few feet away, gathering her things. She caught my eye for a split second, before sliding her hand into Hans' and walking away. I could almost feel the waves of smug radiating off her. Not only did she think I was using Fiona to get back at her, now she'd found someone to do the same to me.

"Jealousy is a powerful emotion." Fiona said softly, but I barely registered her. Then she slid her hand across my shoulder blades, and that I noticed. "And it looks as though she's turned this into a.. competition."

I nodded, slowly this time. "What're you saying?"

"The Queen wants us to date. That means that either I comply with her wishes, or she makes my life a living hell." Fiona explained. "And you need to win your war with Rose and her new boytoy, and to do that you need a girl."

I narrowed my eyes. This all seemed _very_ childish. But Fiona was right - the Queen had already set her sights on us becoming a couple. Even without the Rose problem, it would be hard to get out of it. And maybe Fiona was right. Rose had rejected me at every turn - who was she to tell me not to date Fiona, then show off her personal trainer 'friend' in front of me? It felt wrong to be vying against her with anyone, but that was overcome by my need to prove to her I could move on without her.

In the grand scheme of things, Rose had already won everything else. I left her to be with a woman I didn't love, and she went on to be the greatest guardian we had. _My_ charge had gone insane and stormed off, where she and Lissa were as strong as ever. She had bested me in training, was a higher position than me at court. Hell, she was giving _me_ orders 2 hours a day - an almost perfect mirror image of our situation all those years ago. The tables had turned, and maybe I wasn't man enough to accept that yet.

"Deal." I said, holding out my hand. Fiona's smirk was almost devious, a look I wasn't used to seeing from her. It didn't suit her petit features, and I suddenly wondered what I was getting myself into. This whole situation.. Well, it wasn't exactly something my mother would approve of.

I was here to fix a problem, to fight a war. But maybe I also needed to please the Queen, to regain some of my pride with Rose. I wasn't used to playing games, but this one, I think I needed to win.


	11. Chapter 11

Shorter chapter here, because when it ended nothing I wrote seemed to fit after. So the next chapter will be longer, dealing with the aftermath so to speak. Hope that's alright.

I do have a few minor things I feel I ought to clarify. This is my fault as a writer for not getting this across clearer, but it was obvious in the reviews no-one understood the reasoning behind Dimitri's actions in the last few chapters. **If you don't want them explained to you, and want them to come out the way I had intended in the story - to Rose - then don't read this.** But if I'm actually losing readers because of the misinterpretation of this character I'm trying to portray, well, I'd rather clear it up.

The Dimitri I've written has always been very sure about everything he did, right up until the point he met Rose. Then he had to have a conflict with himself over whether or not his feelings for her was real, and permitted given the circumstances. And at the end of that, in the books, he had the decision of whether or not to leave with Tasha or stay with Rose. In my version, he left. To everyone reading, and to Dimitri especially, it's obvious now this was the wrong choice. He feels guilty for abandoning Rose, and when he first arrived back it was his main plan to try and win her back, as a friend or even more than that. In the back of his mind he had doubts of his worthiness of her, but he wanted what he wanted and decided to try and go for it. And he did. But Rose is stubborn. A man who hurt her so much doesn't deserve a second chance - what if he hurt her again? I'm not writing this from Rose's point of view, but that's kind of how I see it.

And Dimitri, hearing these rejections, started to see that too. The bit of doubt in his mind that what he did could never be undone grew, and he think maybe he just wasn't right for her at all. And if that's true, what right does he have to continue chasing her? He vowed to stay away because in his mind, he was doing more damage than good. And perhaps secretly it was hurting his pride to get shot down again and again. He failed to get into his head - a male failing, I think - that with women, you do sometimes need to persevere, and bailing once again has not helped his cause.

As for the thing with Fiona.. I can only really say that it was a proud man's response to the woman he loves playing games with him. And he also recognises that Rose is only playing these games because she still cares and she wants to hurt him, but he still feels like he should play them back. Maybe she'll snap and confront him and admit everything. Maybe he'll drive her away again. But pretending to be with Fiona is a passive choice that puts all the real ones on hold, the ones he's too afraid to make right now. Bear in mind all the decisions he's made have been during a very high pressure time; all of their lives are in danger right now.

Thanks for reading, if you got this far. Rebecca x

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><p>The week passed the way I assumed all weeks passed at Court. I still spent every morning in guardian training watching Rose flirt like all hell with Hans, and I still spent every afternoon cooped up with Fiona and the new recruits - who, by all accounts, were dumb as a sack of hammers. But I had spent a good portion of my life in difficult situations, and I was reluctant to give up so soon after coming to court. In fact, it wasn't an option. Queen Tatiana was on my case more than usual - to the point that my spare lunch seat had now become Fiona's permanent seating arrangement.<p>

I actually didn't mind Fiona. It had been sweet of her to offer to get involved with the game me and Rose were playing - even if her motives may have been more self serving than I first imagined. The more I saw her and the Queen together, the more I realised just how unhappy Fiona seemed to be with her job. She looked tired constantly, and after speaking to her, I realised just how badly Tatiana treated her. Being forced to date me was hardly the worst thing Tatiana had forced her to do.

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><p>Monday morning of the next week came around quickly, and as I showered off the mud and sweat I'd accumulated during my grueling run in training that morning, I heard two of the other guardians in a quiet, heated discussion a few shower heads along. Keeping my eyes down - I'm hardly in the business of peering over at other naked men - I fiddled with my shampoo bottle as I attempted to listen in over the rush of pouring water. The plastic top bent under my hand as I twisted it, and listened.<p>

"I'm telling you, I was walking back to my room to get my water bottle, and I saw them all. The royal guardians, all the ones I've ever met, plus some, and Christian Ozera was there too." The other guy laughed a little.

"Christian Ozera is always here, man, he's Lady Dragomir's boyfriend, or whatever. What's so weird about that?"

"Look, I'm just saying, it looked like something had gone down. They were walking super quickly, and Ozera did not look happy. He looked like he was about to burst into tears. Or flames. Whatever those fire guys do when they're sad."

"I think they cry, like regular people, dumbass." A shove, a slap on the arm, the splash of water muffled the other man's reply.

"You don't think there was another attack? Maybe they went after Ozera, he's a royal after all."

"Nah, if there was going to be another attack on court, they wouldn't bother going after one single lower ranked royal, would they? Would they..?"

"Hey, think about it, they take out Christian, and that's basically the whole Ozera family gone. There'd only be Princess Natasha, and everyone knows she's gone totally batshi.. Oh. Crap.."

In my hands I held the top of the shampoo bottle, and I felt contents drip over my hands from the snapped end. I dropped the lid and the bottle and backed out of the room. I didn't want to hear any more.

As much as I knew it was true, and perhaps I deserved to listen to it, I didn't want to hear about the crash and burn of Tasha Ozera. The rumors of Tasha's breakdown had taken a while to filter into court from the Academy, but they'd reached here none the less, from siblings of guardians or young royals enjoying the gossip. I dressed quickly and quietly, avoiding everyone's questioning stares - more questioning than usual, I noted - and barreled straight out of the dressing room..

And straight into Fiona.

"I'm so sorry Dimitri.." She said, moving back with her hands up defensively. Her dark hair made an even sterner contrast with her pale skin today - she looked like she'd seen a ghost. "I've been out here for a while.." She twisted her hands together, looking down at the floor and avoiding eye contact with me. "The Queen sent me.." She said softly.

I frowned. "Is this about Christian Ozera?"

Fiona looked up, surprised. "Oh.. Well, yes, sort of.." Her eyes flickered to the changing room door. "Did someone else.. tell you.."

"No, I've got no idea what's going on." I ran a hand through my wet hair, ruffling the long strands in frustration. I hadn't had time to fix it up into a ponytail when leaving and it wasn't looking like I'd get a chance to.

Fiona turned and walked away, sighing as she did. Something told me she didn't want to tell me what she knew, and I decided to leave it until I could hear it straight from the Queen herself. My mind drifted. What if Rose was hurt? No, I had only seen her half an hour ago, and the other guardian had mentioned seeing the royal guardians about 2 hours ago. Perhaps Lissa? No, Rose wouldn't have stayed through training if something was wrong. I shook my head slightly and simply walked. For once, Fiona too stayed silent the whole way.

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><p>The door to the Queen's chambers was an ornate masterpiece - far too fancy to simply be a door. It was a work of art, embellished with gold painting, with a handle the size of my thigh. There was no-one outside, which was strange, as there as usually at least 2 guards posted, protecting the Queen. I didn't feel nearly important enough to be opening the door, so I stood back a step and let Fiona do it. That made her crack a smile, but it was dim and weak, and make me panic further.<p>

The door swung open into what I only assumed was some sort of reception area. Luxurious seats lined the walls, and though they probably had intricate patterns sewn onto them that matched the door, I couldn't see, as every seat was filled. Guardians, Moroi, even some dhampires I recognised as wait staff. And they all turned to look at me.

There was a moment of silence as conversations died at my arrival. I wanted to blush, but that wasn't my way. Instead, I simply walked forward, intent on finding the Queen, or one of the other Moroi in charge, and finding out what the hell was going on.

I didn't make it that far.

Out of the corner of my eye, I saw a pale, dark haired man lunge at me. Reflexes kicked in, and my right hand swung out to grab him by the neck. In a second, I had him pinned to the floor, but as my eyes caught up with my muscles, I released my grip.

"Christian, what on earth!" Lissa pushed her way through the crowd, and moved to lean down at his side. Rose appeared behind her, and put a hand on her best friends shoulder. "No." She said softly. I was caught up in watching their interaction, worry creeping into my features to mirror that on Rose's, and almost didn't see Christian raise his fist to my face. Grabbing it, I pushed his arm back to the floor with a thud in the silence.

"What is your problem, Ozera?" as calmly as I could muster, trying to remain respectful. I was only a dhampire and he a royal Moroi, but he was really pissing me off. Was this about Rose? His Aunt? Why leave it until now?

"It's your fault! It's all your fault! She's gone and if you hadn't left.. If you hadn't.." The boy's body relaxed, the tension in them draining, and he felt like a rag doll underneath my arms as he started to cry. Not quiet sobs, but raucous, vibrating sobs, so loud I could almost feel them in my own chest. I stood from over him, backing away slightly in shock. I then turned to face the room.

Even the dhampires were pale as they stared back at me. The silence - save for Christian's crying - was painful. I raised my arms, like a prisoner surrounded. I felt like one.

"What is he talking about?" I asked, my brain slowing to a halt as I tried to comprehend what the hell was happening. It became clear that this was nothing to do with Rose or Lissa.

The silence carried on. Even Rose avoided my eyes, with Lissa stood beside her, crying quietly, her eyes glued to Christian on the floor in panic and sadness. She looked so helpless, and the silence continued.

But finally, the silence was broken, smashed really, and not by who I expected.

"Oh, you're all a bunch of wimps." Adrian Ivashkov muttered, moving out from behind the desk at the tail end of the room with a casual slouch and a cool expression.

"What everyone in this room is too afraid to tell you, all powerful Belikov, is that your charge was attacked by Strigoi this morning."

Like tunnel vision, suddenly all I could see was Adrian. His face, for once not smug, moved closer. I towered over him in size, but as I stumbled back, I did not feel strong. I willed him not to speak, not to say anything further. I didn't want to hear it.

"Tasha.."

"Yes, Belikov." Adrian said, patting my arm with his hand gently. "Princess Natasha is dead."

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><p>Let me know. Seriously, reviews are my favourite. Next chapter should only be a week, but i'd love to hear from you, so tell me your favourite bit, or something. I dunno.<p>

Rebecca.


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